College Daze

5

The familiar figure continued to dance and sway carelessly under the lights of the party, seemingly unaware of Irwin's eyes on him. Meanwhile, a storm thundered in Irwin's chest. That face...he remembered the way Barry's gentle face glowed under the moonlight - his eyes reflecting the stars, like that of the ocean they sat by. Irwin's heart jumped when his lips recalled the feeling of Barry's against them.

'I have to go talk to him' a war brewed in his mind. 'But it's been months...he probably doesn't remember me. We were so drunk.' Irwin shook his head, his golden locks moving with him.

Just as he shifted from the doorframe to walk forward, a hand grabbed his shoulder from behind. His body went cold as Pez's voice rang out behind him. "So," his words thick from the drinks "which of these lassies are ya starin' at, mate?"

Fighting to relax his shoulders, Irwin replied, "All of 'em, of course." and forced a sly laugh.

"Well, if you can't make up your mind, I've got one for you!" Pez laughed heartily as he spun Irwin around and led him into the kitchen. Away from Barry. "This is my friend, Je-"

Pez's words sounded far from Irwin, as he turned his head back towards the lounge room. 'He's in there.' An excited tone in Pez's voice pulled his attention back to the girl before him.

"She's in my class and she's really cool. I think you two would get along." and with a drunken snicker, Pez was gone. Leaving the two of them standing there silently.

Irwin's eyes fell to the cup in his hands. There wasn't nearly enough liquor in it now. He tried to keep up with the conversation he forced upon him - he'd laugh when she'd flirt, and tried to receive her suggestive remarks with ease. But none of this was easy.

'Get your shit together, Irwin. There's a beautiful girl in front of you, and you haven't gotten laid in months. You're still the same you were before you met hi-' a gentle tug on his belt interrupted his thoughts.

Her eyes pleaded with him. "Let's go upstairs. I saw an empty room up there not too long ago. It should still be open." He nodded in response, and she took his hand to lead him upstairs. They walked right through the living room, and Irwin forced himself to keep his head down.

She was right, the room was still empty.

'Focus, Irwin...'

He hoped this would help him take his mind off of everything. Every time he took a breathe between kisses, his brain betrayed him. Barry's scent flooded his memory. The more worked up she got, the more turned off Irwin was. 'It's not the same.' the words reverberated though his head, taunting him every time her lips pressed against his.

Suddenly, Irwin peeled himself away from the girl and opened his eyes to see her zip-up sweater hanging down her arms, her shirt pulled most of the way up. She was panting, and her face burned red. She was gorgeous, but fuck, she wasn't him.

As his anxieties built up within him, Irwin rushed out of the room. He needed to talk to Barry. 'Fucking, PLEASE..." Irwin practically ran down the stairs. The panic within him continued to grow as he looked for Barry's face in the crowd.

Pez seemed to appear out of thin air. "Hey man, done already?" he laughed as he leaned in to talk to Irwin under the music. Irwin only shook his head. "Where's Jessica then?" Pez's face grew worried. "Is she alright?"

'Is that her name?' Irwin realized he'd never caught it. "She's fine, Pez. I left her upstairs."

"Oh okay. Are you okay? You seem off, mate."

"I'm fine," Irwin tried to swallow the lump in his throat, his eyes still scanning the room for Barry. "I just didn't want to sleep her, man."

Pez staggered back jokingly and laughed. "Irwin Dundee refused a lady? Hold my beer, boys, I'm goin' down!" Pez continued clowning, pretending as though he was going to fall over at the news.

Irwin tried to laugh along. Pez was a great friend, but there's no way Irwin could tell him about the night he shared with Barry. Why he's been so miserable, and couldn't fill the void he'd felt in his chest. One that, he now realized, Barry had left there that fateful night.

'Does he even remember me?'