I wish you loved me instead (Nagito Komeada x Reader)

Chapter 2: The serial

Before you could continue your line of thought you heard a knock at your door. You walked over and opened it timidly, only letting a sliver of the outside world open up to the inside of your cabin before you could tell who it was. Nagito. Of course. You should have realized he would be trying to get an explanation. He seemed shocked at your appearance as you dragged him inside and closed the door. You couldn't have anyone seeing you like this, without a personal barrier.

"Wow!" He simply stated, putting his hands up and laughing good naturedly. He must have noticed the look on your face because his attitude changed quickly. Was your normal look really that unattractive? "I mean, no not wow! You're still very cute, this is just not what I expected." He explained. You looked downwards to hide your face, trying to hide your emotions from him. It was hard to grasp what he even meant when he spoke like that, but saying you were cute was obviously just a pity move. You fiddled nervously with your clothes, still not meeting his eyes. "W-what is it that you want?" You asked, your words coming out in stutters.

He seemed to ignore your question completely, focusing on your new appearance and demeanor. "So the whole ultimate flirt thing is a cover up? Interesting!" It was a statement, more so than a question. It's not like it wasn't an obvious fact that the former person he met with was not the same person, in a way. You really didn't know what to respond, but he didn't give you time either way. "So is it like a split personality thing or more of a coping thing?" He asked, this time the question being a genuine question. He was overstepping his boundaries but for some reason you felt inclined to talk to him about it. Maybe you had needed to tell someone the truth for a while but just never had the chance.

"I don't know anymore, t-to be honest." He didn't have much of a reaction, but his face changed slightly to a more natural look than the former excited one he held. It was like he was understanding what you were saying. "It started out like a coping thing. Now it's like, uhh.." You paused, trying to find the right words, and trying to stop yourself from oversharing. "I-it's like just another part of me."

He smiled. "I understand. The world has a way of pushing you into a box and it's hard to escape once you're in it. You're lucky, not many people have a chance to just escape it like this." There seemed to be loathing dripping in his use of the word lucky, and you wondered why. He was the ultimate lucky student, so it didn't really make sense for him to be uncomfortable with the concept. His understanding seemed to come from a place of relating, which was nice. Although you could not imagine what kind of box he felt he was shoved into.

"So why did you not tell Hajime your real name?" You almost cringe, but you manage to catch yourself. For some reason you had hoped he had forgotten about it because of his earlier curiosities. It takes a lot of courage but you manage to get yourself to look up at him and meet his eyes for the first time since he entered and you shouldn't have. At first he is smiling, but as his eyes catch yours his eyes soften in a really unnerving way, a slight blush somehow making it to his face. You cannot even begin to fathom what he is thinking. But the way he looks at you with slight pity is weird. He looks almost deranged. It looks like he has something to say but he waits patiently for your answer.

"I-I guess I know Hajime." You simply reply, trying to find a way to explain it. He seems to look up and think about it, putting a finger on his chin in a thoughtful motion, answering for you. "Ah, I get it. You know Hajime as you, not as the other you." You nod eagerly, happy that he got it without having to explain much. But then once again he stuns you with a question you don't have much of an answer for. "Why? Are you ashamed of your talent?" Despite being caught off guard by his words you are quick to answer. "N-no, it's not like that!"

He smiles. "Good." He simply answers. He looks out the window, seeing that the colour of the sky has already started to change and become slightly darker. This seems to be his cue to leave you, letting you rest. You just hope he won't tell anyone else. But you doubted he would share your secret.