Mental Mate • Damon Albarn

One

And there she was, tattoos everywhere his eyes could see from behind her. Straight dark hair, just passing mid way down her back, following her close behind as she moved her head to look to her left. She was propped up on her elbows against a sticky bar, in a shitty pub, in a shite area of London.

He thought she looked similar from somewhere but just could not pin it, until she turned around with a pint glass in her grip and a cigarette tucked behind her ear. The red from the pubs lights accentuating her strong cheekbones and mean eyebrows.

Oasis' drummer!
That was it!

She was Liams twin, they had just done a show in London infact. So why was she in the pub on her own?

He was about to get up and ask her before an older man had bet him to it.

"Wots a pritty lass like you doin ere?"

He reached forward to her stomach she still hasn't acknowledged him, she was reading random writing scribbled on the walls by the pubs visitors, but as soon as his grimy hands touched her she was quick to respond. "Get 'e fuck off me you cunt" She warned, he kept going, rubbing her thigh. She turned, her hand smashing his nose into the bar. His head ricocheting off practically bouncing. His hands quick to feel his nose, as if it would disappear. Before he could reach his face she swung a fist straight at his jaw, the rings scattered across her fingers and her bony knuckles adding extra damage. He was quick to fall to the floor, the alcohol in his system not helping his case.

"Wanker" she muttered before walking out, removing the cigarette from her ear and placing it between her lips. Once reaching outside she grabbed a lighter from beside her breast, stuffed into her dress along with a collection of £20 notes Liam had gave her as her "redundancy funds".

She was about to light it before a southern voice interrupted, "are you the Gallagher sister?" He asked sounding sheepish not even alcohol could give him the confidence around her, she just smashed a random lads face in.

"Nah, not anymore mate" she replied licking her lips and placing the cigarette back in her mouth.

"How come? Took a DNA test?"

She laughed dryly as the cigarette stuck to her lip with help from the saliva coating from when she licked her lips.

"Nah got kicked out init" she smirked looking at the lad who had loosened up, she finally got to light her cigarette.

"What'd ya do?" He asked, she took the cigarette from her lips offering him a drag.

"Cant behave myself" she laughed at the hypocrisy, most of the time when she got in trouble was with them, like when they got kicked off a ferry and deported when they were going to a gig.

She couldn't help but recognise him too, she was sure she heard his voice from somewhere in her deep record collection.

"Damon fuckin Albarn!" She thought aloud. Shocking the poor lad.

"That's me" he chuckled nervously scratching the back of his neck.

"Sorry love didn't mean to shout" she laughed, he was a funny lad she liked his music an all, she often played guitar along with the song. Completely guessing the cords.

She informed him of her hobbies with his songs earning a gasp from him. "What?" She questioned, was it like illegal or sum shit of course laws never stopped her, if you walked into her room there's probably a stolen traffic cone a stolen tesco trolley and a ton of road signs.

"No- no it's just Grahams fucked off and we don't have anyone to play guitar, you any good?"

"Yeah mate, I wanted on guitar but Noelie canny play drums the twat and they didn't fancy telling big bad G to piss off because I wanted on bass." Damon laughed at the nicknames she had for everyone.

"Well 'eres my number doll, I'll think about your offer" she smiled before starting to walk home.

Damon was quick to return the gossip to the rest of his band.

"Lads I just had the best conversation ever with... Monroe Fucking Gallagher! She says she'll maybe play for us!" The lads couldn't believe it they were quick to laugh at him.

"What have you been drinkin mate!" Dave laughed, Alex joining along.

But Damon's face staying seriously still "Lads I'm serious! I even got her number!"

"Justine won't be happy about that" Alex chimed in still laughing.

"Oh fuck her, and fuck you lot too for not believing me" he sat down in a huff, sliding down the booth and crossing his arms.

"Thought she was in Oasis anyway?" Dave spoke up to the toddler throwing a hissy fit.

"They kicked her out for not behaving" causing Alex to spit his drink all over the empty seat.

"Christ why do we want her in our band then? She's fucking mental mate"

Im completely making up this story line btw