Måneskin Imagines

Nothing Stays The Same - Ethan Torchio

Pairing: Ethan Torchio x GN! Reader

Warnings: Angst, falling out of love.

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I don't know if I love them anymore.

I don't know if I love them.

I don't know...

The sound of rain and thunder was deafening, but not enough to muffle the sentence that was repeating itself over and over again. The one sentence that slowly burned every single bit of your body and tore your heart apart the longer you thought about it.

You knew you shouldn't have been there. You knew he hadn't meant for you to hear it, not in that way at least, but you had and no matter how hard you tried, you couldn't erase the memory away. Not when everything had finally clicked.

Things with Ethan hadn't been the same for a while. Months of traveling and constantly being apart had already started to slowly take a toll on your relationship as much as you'd both tried to ignore it. You'd heard the same story several times, how common it was for people to fall out of love, but had never believed it would happen to you two.

How foolish you'd been all along. Your relationship had been slipping past your fingers for months and you had been too blind to notice it, not like there is much one can do when they realize the person they love most doesn't love them back anymore. No words or actions could ever return things to how they were the moment you two started dating.

You had unconsciously accepted that truth when you noticed he didn't look at you the same anymore, when nights of love and passion faded into awkwardness and a cold sensation you could feel to your bones, when instead of getting excited by the thought of him getting back home you got scared things were only going to start getting worse.

Everything made sense the moment you heard him admit to his friends that he didn't love you anymore. It had all been an accident, he thought you weren't home but you had forgotten your keys inside the coat you'd worn the day before and were forced to return and get them before you headed to work.

Ethan had seen you standing there, with tears wetting your cheeks and the pain in your eyes. His guilty expression was still tattooed on your brain as you thought about what he'd said one more time and played with the engagement ring on your finger, that now felt far too heavy and like it didn't belong there at all.

You'd been locked inside your shared bedroom for almost half an hour now, trying to put yourself together before he walked in so you could talk about what you'd heard, not like there was much to talk about anyway. You closed your eyes and rested your head on your knees as he knocked on the door one more time. You were just dragging out the torture out for both of you and you were more than aware of it, but the irrational part of you was convinced that if you let him stand out there for long enough maybe he'd change his mind. It was a dumb thing really, so you finally uttered out the words you'd been dreading.

Ethan walked in right after you told him it was okay to do so, with his hands buried in the pockets of his jeans and his eyes avoiding yours. He took a seat on the bed next to you and, almost as if it was second nature, pulled you to his side to try and comfort you. Even if his feelings for you weren't what they had once been, he still felt the need to protect you.

His small action only made you fall apart again and this time you didn't hold back and cried on his shoulder as he rested his head on your chin and tried to pull you even closer to his body. Even though all sounds seem to mix together into something unintelligible, you were still able to make out the few words he kept saying under his breath over and over again, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

You pulled away from his embrace and shook your head as you wiped the tears off your face, "There's nothing to be sorry for, Ethan." You cupped his face with your shaky hands and softly brushed his wet cheek with your thumb, "Look, I'm not going to lie, this fucking sucks and I can't deny I'm... heartbroken, but this was bound to happen."

He shook his head before resting his forehead against yours, "I promised I'd love you forever, and I failed to keep my promise."

"There are just promises that should never be made, my love." You mumbled and breathed in. You had no clue how you'd managed to stay calm considering how much your heart was aching to scream into his face and blame him for something he truly couldn't control. Relationships weren't one-sided and even though you were in pain, you knew you'd somehow contributed to him falling out of love with you.

"You—I... You truly changed my life," He confessed with a small smile on his face, "I'll always thank you for these years I've spent by your side. You're truly such a beautiful person, Y/N. You deserve someone who can fully return all the love in this pretty heart of yours. I wish I could say that was me. I wish I could say I love you, but you don't deserve to be lied to. I'm sorry you had to find out the way you did."

"It needed to happen. Otherwise, I'm afraid we would've held onto this for much longer, which wouldn't have been any good for either of us. Just know I don't regret a thing, yeah? I wouldn't change these past few years for anything. I honestly don't know what else to say so uh... I'll be out by morning."

You got up from the bed and did your best to avoid his stare as he pleaded, "Let's not take this as a goodbye, please."

"Fine then. I'll see you later Ethan."