[ It's all my fault ] Mammon

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The white-haired demon would visit his human in her room whenever he was feeling down. The girl would sing for him as she cuddles him to make him fall asleep. Her gentle voice, warm body, and lastly, her smile would make the demon's day. But it is different now,

No one could comfort him, cuddle him, telling 'not everything is your fault.', for it was hard for him.

"[(Y/n)], [(Y/n)], [(Y/n)], please."

The demon called out her name. The human looked at him as she wiped his tears, "It's- okay. I do not want to see you crying while I die," she smiled at him, "Do not say that! You are not going- going to-"

"Always remember that I love you, Mammon."

Mammon's Pov

Isn't it funny how you used to ask me, "Stay, please?" now I have to hold you in my arms with blood and watch you leave.

Everything is all my fault. I couldn't protect you, even though I promised that I would keep ya safe, and I failed.

I still could not accept the fact that you are now gone.

"I pro- promise I will come back-"

Those words you've said to me back then, though ya knew it was a lie. Do you think that I'll believe that? No, though I do wish that you will come back.

What the hell am I going to do without you?

End of Mammon's Pov

And the girl who wanted him to stay was the first who went away.

Mammon is curling on the bed of [(Y/n)], every time he can't stop thinking about her. His tears rolled down to his cheeks, sobbing quietly, as he covered his mouth, not wanting his brothers to hear.

The demon's heart feels heavy, struggling to breathe since he still would not accept what happened. Mammon scratched himself as a punishment.

: A punishment for not keeping her safe from danger.

: A punishment for being stupid.

: A punishment for not doing everything right.

: A punishment for being a failure.

He deserves all the pain, he thought to himself.

Mammon hissed in pain, later noticing blood all over his body. He did not care about it, although he deserves it, right?

It has been weeks after the incident to [(Y/n)]. She got killed by unknown demons who came into her room. The seven demon brothers did not know because her mouth was shut, unable to scream or call for help.

She could only call from her head,

She called for him,

"Mammon-"

Mammon has not come out of [(Y/n)]. His brothers are worried about him, as they know it is hard for Mammon, but it is also hard for them after losing [(Y/n)]. Mammon did not eat his meals, which had Lucifer and the others worried.

He changed.

He becomes cold to his brothers and even to himself.

"Mammon, I told you to eat up."

The voice of Lucifer speaks as he holds Mammon's food, waiting for him to take it. While Mammon did not even try to turn his head to look at him,

"I told ya, didn't I? I said I don't want to eat," he says.

"Are you disobeying me?"

"What if I am? Are you going to punish me or scream at me?"

"No-"

"Are you going to insult me all over again to hurt me? If so-"

"I am already hurt. I don't care anymore, so leave me alone."

Lucifer is speechless after hearing Mammon. He got hurt because he could not know how to comfort him. Lucifer knew that [(Y/n)] could comfort him, but sadly she was gone.

It's a pain to see if your younger feels like this.

The other demon brothers, hearing behind the front door.

The eldest brother quickly grabbed Mammon's arm, "Hey- Hey, let go!" he yelled at him, but that did not stop Lucifer. He rolled up his sleeves and found scars everywhere, "It's even worse than before-" "Why do you care?"

Mammon pulled back his arms from Lucifer, "I am your brother. Have you forgotten?" Lucifer says, but-

The way he sees Mammon is different from the old Mammon. He changed, Lucifer thought to himself.

"I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologizing?"

"I could not protect her. It is all my fault." Mammon says, and Lucifer sighed, "It is not your fault-"

"IT IS MY FAULT, YOU FUCK!"

Mammon yelled as he got up on the bed, "ADMIT IT, I WAS OUT THERE GAMBLING, AND HERE SHE WAS, DYING. IF ONLY I-"

"Mammon, calm down-"

"HA!? CALM DOWN? HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO CALM DOWN, HUH?! EASY FOR YOU TO SAY! TE- TELL ME LUCIFER. IT'S MY FAULT."

"..."

No response from Lucifer.

"WHY ARE YOU NOT TELLING ME THAT IT'S MY FAULT?! I FIND IT FUNNY HOW YOU ALWAYS TELL ME THAT IT'S MY FAULT, IT'S MAMMON'S FAULT, ALL ME- FUCKING BULLSHIT SAY SOMETHING!"

The other brothers came into the room to calm Mammon, but that did not work.

"Oh, my dear brothers! Tell me something that you always call me, come on!" Mammon says, laughing, waiting for an answer. They all looked at him worriedly.

"Ma- Mammon, it's okay-"

Levi says, worried in his voice.

"CALL ME STUPID, A FAILURE, OR A SCUMBUG FOR NOT SAVING [(Y/N)]! EVERYTHING IS MY FAULT- IT'S KILLING ME INSIDE- THIS FEELING INSIDE ME IS EATING ME-"

Mammon says, trembling as his knees give up and fall on the floor.

Regret and pain.

He blames himself for everything.

''If I am not born, then everything would turn out fine."

He couldn't stop blaming himself.

He needs her back because he cares about her.

And the human cared about him as well.

Even though he is stupid or a scumbag, yet she still accepts him. Mammon got happy when someone finally counted on him for who he is, but-

That someone is long gone.

Now, Mammon is all alone.

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