Being mentally ill plus suicidal at a young age before 18 is strange, because you grow up with this idea that one day you'll finally snap, turn off, be brave enough to kill yourself, or that you'll recover from your mental illness and that everything will fall in the right place like it seems to with normal people, so you don't really plan for the future, and then before you know it, you're 18 and you're an adult but you never really thought you'd get this far and sure it's great that you're still alive you guess, but also you feel so alone and lost in a world you never expected or planned to be a part of.
