Only Yours in my Dreams // Alma Peregrine x Reader

Chapter Eighteen- Alma

She had finished replacing your bandages and announced that it was nearly time for lunch. So she helped you up and led you to the dining room, where she frowned at the wooden chairs. "Will you be able to sit in these?"

"I'll be fine, Miss." You looked up at her, wrapping your arm around her waist for extra support. You watched as her eyes held a glint of conflict for just a brief second, before going back to normal.

"Alma." She said softly, almost as though she were still unsure.

"What?"

"You can call me Alma."

You let out a laugh, slightly bitter but mostly surprised. "Four years of living here and trying to call you that. Nearly every time I got scolded for it. Why now?" She paused and thought for a moment, deciding what to say.

"Things are different now." She led you to the table and sat you down in the seat next to hers, ever careful of your back.

"Wait, what do you mean?" You asked, but she refused to look at you or speak further.

"I'll be back momentarily." With that she disappeared into the kitchen, where you heard low voices. You waited patiently for her return, and when she reentered, she had Olive with her. The redhead gave you a pitiful look, which you would normally have a comeback for, but you just accepted it.

"Hey, y/n. Lunch is almost ready. I'll sit by you, if that's cool?" You nodded and she took the empty spot next to you while Miss Peregrine set the table, then went out to collect the others. "How are you feeling?"

"Like shit."

"Is there anything I can do?"

"Well, normally I'd tell you to put me out of my misery, but after what happened today I think I'd rather not do that." It almost sounded like one of your dark jokes, but you were dead serious. When she gave you a curious look, you sighed. "Coming back here I nearly- Well, technically not nearly. I did die. And now The Bird's acting all weird." You were casual about it, but your face remained completely blank, your voice free of inflection, much like the apathy that Enoch always sported. She looked at you in horror and you shrugged. "I'm not dead now, relax."

"I- How did you- Birds, y/n, you just can't keep out of trouble can you?" She put a hand gently on your shoulder and tried to joke with you, but you just looked at her.

"I suppose not. But while we're on the subject, do you have any clue why Miss P's acting so weird?" You asked your redheaded best friend, who paled instantly.

"Well. You did randomly disappear for a week, without telling anyone anything, then when she finds you you are seriously injured- I mean, that could have been fatal. Then you DIE, I'd say she has every right to act a little weird." She didn't technically lie, and of course she couldn't know for sure, but she did suspect it also had something to do with your feelings. But she had no idea how the woman was acting toward you anyway so it was a null point.

"I mean, I guess so. I just didn't want this. This is exactly why I left, I was afraid of things changing after I told her that I'm gay, and now I'm back and everything is so different." You sighed in frustration and bowed your head.

"I know that's not the only reason." She said quietly.

"She's gonna find out and it's gonna suck. She's gonna hate me, and she'll avoid me." You massaged your temples and Olive placed a hand gently on your shoulder.

"I promise you she won't." She said softly. You gave her a look and scoffed.

"You can't know that. Don't make a promise you can't keep."

"She will not hate you for it. You have to believe me, y/n."

"I can't, Olive."

She sighed heavily, knowing you weren't going to listen to her. Even though she knew she was right, because she knew that Miss Peregrine did know. She just hoped that wasn't the reason the woman was acting weird. You really were in a sticky situation- Everyone was. But it would resolve itself eventually, just like it always did. Right?

Miss Peregrine returned and took her place beside you, examining your slouched posture and the way you were holding onto the table tightly.

"Y/n, would you prefer to go lay down?" She asked you, taking your hand nearest her and loosening your grip on the table so she could slip her hand into yours. You looked up at her and shook your head.

"I can eat, Miss." You were stubborn, you hated to let anyone know if you were in pain or feeling unwell. So, now, as always you would pretend the pain you were in was less than it was. She could see through it though, she could see it in the way you held yourself, and she had seen your face twisted in pain even in sleep. She rubbed over the back of your hand with her thumb and gave you a gentle look.

"You don't have to pretend, love."

You pulled your hand away from hers and laid it in your lap, wishing she would just stop calling you that stuff. It hurt so much. Finally everyone was in place, and even Enoch was looking at you with pity in his dark eyes. You gave him a halfhearted glare and turned your attention down to your full plate as Miss Peregrine gave the cue to eat.

You picked up a baby carrot and took a tiny bite, before setting it back down with a sad look. Nothing tasted good anymore. You didn't know if it was the medicine causing that, or the pain. Or perhaps it was the bitter taste of love. Whatever it was, it affected you so much that you only ate about a quarter of the food on your plate before pushing it away with a resigned look. Lunch was eaten in silence, that is until your ymbryne noticed you had stopped eating quite a while ago.

"Is it bad? I can get you something else, if you'd prefer." She offered, motioning to the barely touched food on your plate.

"I'm just not hungry. I want to go to my room, if that's cool." She hesitated and you gave her a questioning look. "It's still my room, right?"

"Well, yes. I was just thinking about the pain you're in and- Well, I would like to be able to keep an eye on you. Would you be comfortable sleeping in my bed? It's softer than yours, and I have a loveseat that I could sleep on. Of course, it's quite alright if you'd rather not do that. I just thought it might be easier." She bit at the corner of her bottom lip as she watched you think.

"That's fine." Your voice was breathy and weak. She panicked when she heard it, assuming it was because of your pain, but truly it was the fact that she had just asked you to sleep in her bed. Damn it, this was going to be harder than you thought.

"Come here. I've got you." She stood and made her way to your side, where she proceeded to help you up. Her arm snaked around your waist, a feeling that was quickly becoming familiar to you, and yours around hers. You looked back at your concerned friends and caught the sly look that both Emma and Olive were giving you and shook your head lightly in response.

When you arrived at her room, she laid you down gently on her bed, making sure you were comfortable. You watched her settle into the loveseat close by, and admired the shine of her hair in the sunlight, her hawklike gaze resting solely on you. You were both staring at each other, you realized.

"It's rude to stare, you know." She teased, and you rolled your eyes.

"Deal with it, Alma." You gave her the smallest smile as her name rolled naturally off your tongue. Then your mood grew somber again and you sighed. "You really wanna know what happened?"

"Only if you're comfortable telling me."

"Buckle in..." As you began to tell your story, you were sucked into an all too vivid flashback of the fateful event.

A/n- hehehe dead serious hehehe i'm so funny
but fr we're about to find out what happened and it's getting juicyyyyy