'Died' ~Layne Staley and John Frusciante story

Chapter 27

John's POV

I was home alone doing the dishes when I heard someone knock on the front door. I thought nothing of it and continued to clean. But the knocking didn't stop. I knew it wasn't Layne because he had the key.
"Layne, if you're in there, let me in. We need to talk." I heard Jerry's voice.
I kinda expected a visit from him. Layne still didn't get back to him with an answer to whether they were going to play the MTV Unplugged show. It was actually the 10th of April, the day of the show's anniversary.
I rushed to the door and let Jerry in.
"Hey, Layne's not home. But you can stay and wait for him to come back." I told him.
"Thanks, John. What's up with your boyfriend? Why is he avoiding me?" Jerry asked me.
He seemed to be very affected by Layne's behavior.
"Layne has a hard time making up his mind about the show."
"Why? He sounds better than ever!"
"He feels a lot of pressure because of how successful that show was."
"But... That's gonna sound harsh. But there's no way he's gonna do worse this time."
"I know."
"What am I supposed to tell him?"
"You know him better than I do, Jerry."
"No, I never found a way to get to Layne like you do. All I did was threaten him, ridicule him, and belittle him. I can't be that person anymore. Now I understand how badly my words hurt him. He fucking hated my guts for years. If it wasn't for you, we'd probably still not talk to one another."
"Oh, actually... I met Layne 1 year ago on April 5th. He's gonna have 1 year sober next month. I really wanna make that day special for him." I told Jerry and noticed that his eyes started glistening with tears.
"Wow, it's been a year already... He's never been sober for that long. Even when we hired a guy to follow him around to make sure he wasn't using, Layne didn't last 3 months."
"Yeah, he's doing amazing. But lately he's been a nervous wreck. All he thinks about is that show."
"Can't you help him make that decision? I know you want him to agree."
"No, I want this to be his choice. I don't wanna pressure Layne into doing something he doesn't wanna do." I said and looked deeply into Jerry's eyes.
"Oh, I see. You're blaming me for making Layne do it. The truth is he needed the money."
"I never said that."
"You're full of shit, John. So full of shit."
"You're not gonna insult me in my house. Get out."
"Maybe Layne was right."
"In what?"
"I think you're cheating on him with that Josh guy."
"What? That's not true! I'd never cheat on Layne and you know that. You know what, Jerry? I think I got you figured out."
"Oh yeah?"
"Absolutely. You hate Layne's partners because you wanna have him all to yourself to manipulate him like a little puppet. That's not what best friends do." I told Jerry.
I was surprised by how quiet he was after what I just said. He didn't speak a word. Instead, he started crying. Did my words hurt him that much? I was confused.
"I don't hate you. I'm sorry that you think so." Jerry said.
"You just said I'm full of shit and I cheat on Layne."
"I didn't mean to. I get carried away when I'm angry. I'm really sorry."
"Why did you cry?"
"Because... You're right. I'm a manipulator." Jerry told me.
I stayed silent for a moment as I was so shocked by what I just heard.
"Well, realization is the first step to improvement." I said.
Then we heard a car pulling up to the house.
"This must be Layne. Quick, wipe off your tears." I said and handed Jerry a box of Kleenex.
I got up and walked outside to welcome Layne and prepare him for a conversation with Jerry.
"Hey, babe." I said.
"Oh, hi." He said.
I bet he was surprised to see me outside.
"We need to talk." I told him.
Layne froze.
"Fuck, Johnny, I'm sorry... I wanted to tell you but I was ashamed..." He spoke.
"Wait, what? What are you talking about? Have you got something to hide?" I asked.
Layne took my hand and looked me in the eyes.
"Do you like it?" He asked.
"What am I supposed to like? I'm sorry, I don't know what you're talking about." I said.
"You really didn't notice?"
"No, baby. You just have to tell me."
"I got Botox."
"Really?"
"Yes... I... I feel old when I look in the mirror. I wanted to get rid of all those lines on my face." Layne confessed.
I took a closer look at Layne. I noticed tiny red spots all over his face. Maybe he did appear to look younger than he did before... I wasn't sure.
"I also got some filler in my undereyes and smile lines..." Layne added.
I nodded and smiled at him.
"So you're not mad at me?" He asked.
"How could I be? You were beautiful to me before you got the Botox and you're just as beautiful now. Do you like the results?" I said and asked my boyfriend.
"Yes, I'm happy with how I look now. The easthetician told me that it'll take a couple of day for the Botox to fully work."
"Did it hurt?"
"A little bit. It's nothing compared to that tattoo I got."
"I love you, darling. You look great. What's important to me is that you're happy with the way you look." I said and hugged Layne.
"Let's go inside." He said.
"That's what I wanted to talk to you about."
"What's wrong?"
"Jerry's here."
"What?"
"Yep. He wants to talk to you about the MTV Unplugged."
"Oh, God, no..."
"Babe, just listen to what he has to say. You don't have to agree."
"Okay, that's fair."
"Just, please... Don't let him manipulate you."
"So he wants to do this... I thought so."
"Yeah, yeah, he does."
"Okay." Layne said and took a deep breath before entering the house.
I followed behind him and went to the kitchen to continue cleaning. I wanted to stay close to hear how the conversation went.
"Hey, brother." Jerry greeted Layne.
"I know I'm an idiot and a dickhead, you don't have to say that. I'm sorry for not answering your calls." Layne told him.
"I didn't come here to insult you. Today's April 10th, we played that show 7 years go. 7 years, can you believe it? I refuse to believe that so much time has gone by."

Layne's POV

"I know." I said.
We stayed silent for too long. Someone had to finally say something but I didn't know what to say.
"You look amazing, L. And that tattoo, wow! It's beautiful. It makes you look even more badass." Jerry said, running his fingers over my new tattoo.
"Thanks, Jer. I hope you're not just saying that to make me feel better about myself."
"I'm dead serious. I know you always struggled with your self-image and body dysmorphia. But I never understood why. You're the most handsome guy I've ever met. You always got all the girls." He said and smiled at me.
"You know that I was never into fucking random girls. Demri was the only girl I ever loved. I wanted her to tell me that I was beautiful but she never did. She only loved herself..." And said and sobbed.
"Stop talking about her. She's been long gone. I bet John constantly tells you how handsome you are."
"Yeah, he does. But... I still don't feel confident in my own body. My new body I should say. I haven't been this heavy in 20 years. I don't look like myself anymore and it doesn't feel like my body anymore." I said.
"But you look great! You're were so unhealthy, Layne. That's how you were supposed to look all along."
"You think so? I feel fat."
"Are you joking? You've got a six-pack. You should be proud of the way you look now."
"And you really think my new tattoos are cool? Don't they look ridiculous on me?" I asked.
"Layne, stop doubting yourself." Jerry told me.
"I'm sorry." I whispered.
"Hey, don't apologize, it's okay. Why don't we do something that will make you feel better, huh?"
"What do you have in mind?"
"Let's jam." He said.

Me, Jerry, and John went downstairs to the basement and entered John's rehearsal room. I recently bought a piano for this space and spent a lot of time there.
"Let's rehearse for the show." I said.
"What show?" Jerry asked.
John smiled at me and gave me the thumbs up.
"The MTV Unplugged." I replied.
"Oh yeah! So you're in?" Jerry asked, grinning.
"Yeah, I'm in."

I sat by the piano and started to play a song written by my late friend Andrew Woods. I wondered if John was gonna like it because he's never heard Andrew's music before.

"Chloe don't know better
Chloe is just like me, only beautiful
A couple of years' difference
But those lessons never learned
Did you know?
Chloe does the tables in the French Quarter
She's always been given
So I can't always make her laugh
But I'm proud to say
And I won't forget
The time spent layin' by her side
The time spent layin' by her side
Dreams like this must die
And a dream like this must die"

"It's beautiful. Did you write that?" John asked me.
"It's Andrew Wood's song! Jeez, you didn't know that?" Jerry said, he was visibly pissed.
"Um, no, who is that?" John asked.
"Andrew was our dear friend. He ODed in 1990. We wouldn't be who we are today if it wasn't for him." I explained.
"Wood, Would? Does it ring a bell?" Jerry asked John.
"Oh, is that song about him?" My boyfriend asked.
"No, it's not about him. It's a tribute for him. I don't know how you've never heard of him. Have you even listened to Temple of the Dog?" Jerry questioned John.
"Jer, stop it! It's irrelevant. Give him a break." I scolded my best friend.
Poor John's cheeks turned bright red.
"I'm sorry, I was never into grunge. I was more into funk and punk rock when I was younger." Johnny explained.
"And that's absolutely fine, honey. Jerry's just being an ass." I told my boyfriend.
"Yeah, whatever. Let's start with Nutshell. Do you know how to play it, John?" Jer asked John.
Johnny nodded and started playing the riff on his acoustic guitar. It sounded so beautiful...
I watched John's brows furrow and his eyes close as his slender fingers moved on the fretboard.
He was so beautiful... I was so damn lucky to have him.
I loved everything about John. I've always wanted to be with someone so affectionate and empathetic...

"Earth to Layne. You're gonna get an orgasm if you keep looking at John like that. Are you singing or not?" Jerry's voice snapped me out of my daydream.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm sorry." I said and grabbed the microphone.