Butterflies of the Dark Star

49 (REVISED)

In. Out. In. Out.

It went along with her echoing footsteps.

On the trail of star-splattered desolation, unable to flee the weight on her shoulders, unable to do anything but head into the black hole weaving around him. A strong, gravitational force tugged a string around her heart. Music squashed into silence and the universe whispered for the eyes of time.

I won't—can't let this kill you. I can't let it end like this. I knew at the start of the loop; no, I knew the moment you dropped this necklace in my hands. In a way, I still didn't want to believe. But that's what I told myself. We're back here again. Through writing nebulous tendrils, she came closer to the collapsed star. It unravelled to reveal Neo, who stood in front of the transit with an empty expression.

The light in the greys swallowed by the event horizon of a dead star.

"I said we'd work this out together if you got some rest," she said and ignored the tormented atmosphere.

"I can't rest." He gazed at the distance. "I can't rest until it is expunged." He trembled. "I can't stop until it is complete and whole again. If I stop, I will not be able to finish it. I must get to it."

The longer I prolong this, the farther away you get.

"It's okay to slow down," she whispered and came to his side. As with the northern terminal, it sprouted the same incomprehensible letters of before. "I just... are you sure about this?" she asked and held his shoulder. Give me something, Neo. No matter how deep this goes, that you're still you.

In his silence, she found no reprieve or comfort. The transit doors opened, and she reached out before he went deeper; to grab him or stop him, it was too late for both. Too late for everything but to hold onto his clammy, cold hand.

You're not a corpse, not yet.

"You don't have to come with me." He squeezed her hand as if she was all that remained to keep him out of reach of the black hole of his own creation.

Nova listened to the dissonance of a heartbeat. "You have a track record of getting yourself into trouble. You'd hurt yourself if you didn't have someone keeping an eye on you."

Neo tipped forward to break from his staredown with the abyss. Nova longed for a quip, or the smallest joke.

Anything, Neo, please.

His hand slipped out of her grasp.

Nova gave chase when he walked into the transit, to not be left ahead again in the desolation of dead stars. As the transit rumbled to life, the music intensified with a surging peak. Neo leaned on the door.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

"Why?"

In one slow breath, he answered, "Time loses meaning here. I don't even know if it's sunrise or sundown back home. I can only see in this pocket." His shoulders slacked, and he twisted to her with a familiar smile of compounded pain. "I... I don't know why I'm sorry... because there's too many reasons." He returned to his inanimate support and darkness covered the future ahead. "I just want things to make sense."

Nova took another leap of hope. "Neo, we could still stop by the central medical tower. You need to lie down for a couple minutes." Arms folded, she nudged him with her foot. "Look, ever since I met you... it's sometimes like you're driven solely by an automotor. Isn't that exhausting? Sometimes you're just... you're so far away. I can't tell what you're thinking."

"Yes." Neo slipped his brow on his arm. "More than you can understand."

"I want to understand."

"You'd be one of the few."