Maria, Pull the Trigger and Kill (a World War II adventure)

Getting Screwed

June, 1945.

In all those days that I spent in hospital and the few days I had been back in service, I did not muster the guts to break the news about Wilhelm's death to his mom. Numerous times, I thought about how to word it and how to explain everything and then dismissed it all again. I was a coward in regards.

I was standing on the dais of Johanna's farmhouse and savagely kissed with Wilhelm. It felt so good, it felt so right. I was getting hot and this time, I would drag him inside my room, landlord or not. Suddenly, Wilhelm interrupted our kissing and asked: "Where have you gone?" I looked at him surprised and I said: "I'm right here. I have not gone anywhere."

He repeated: "Maria, where have you gone? You are not here with me."

Why did he talk English all of a sudden?

Not understanding, what he was talking about, I looked him up from toe to head and now I saw it. His chest had several bullet wounds from which he was bleeding. Frantically I cried: "Wilhelm, what happened to you? We need to get you to a hospital."

He did not react to what I had just said and repeated: "Maria, where have you gone? You are not here with me."

I realized, that he was moving away from me. Not walking, he was slowly moving backwards like if he would be standing on an invisible escalator. I tried to follow him, but as hard as I tried I did not move forward. With all my might and all my power I tried to run to him, but I was just moving in slow motion. Seconds later he became a speck in the dark and was gone.

That moment I woke up and my heart trembled. I cried bitterly. "Wilhelm, I'm here, where are you", I whispered?

4th of July 1945

We celebrated independence day. First there was a banquet and afterwards everybody, including myself got bloody drunk. If the Wehrmacht would have lasted to the 4th of July, they could have overthrown us easily.

As a liaison officer, I had built up connections to many influential people in Frankfurt. Craftsmen, architects, shop owners, factory owners, politicians and administrative officers. Officially, the Nazis had to get prosecuted and not deployed in public services. The reality, however, was that almost all politicians and administrative officers did have high-ranking positions during the Nazi regime already. Mostly the very same positions, actually. Many of them had been instrumental with the incarceration and deportation of Jews, the seizing of their property and often enough worse. Brigadier General Phipps was there again and he started some small talk: "Captain Gonzales. I hear you do a great job in logistics?"

"Thank you Sir. I have a lot of work to do and I'm glad the army is satisfied with me."

"Have you thought about starting a family already", he asked?

A bit of a personal matter that he touched right in the second sentence. "Well, I have not meet the right man yet", I responded, not going into details.

"A beautiful young woman, should not really have an issue there", he stated.

Was that a compliment of sorts? It could have as well come from my mother.

In order to drive the conversation away from this private matter I brought the former Nazis in positions of power matter on the table. However, he simply dismissed it: "Well, how do you believe, we should run this country? Which people should execute all the administrative objectives? We can only prosecute the biggest war criminals and those, which do not have any important civilian function. Unfortunately, the ones with important civilian roles, especially politicians and administrative officers will get away with their heinous deeds. We will have to leave their punishment up to God."