The Flower You Painted (Steve Rogers X Reader)

Chapter 5: Living on borrowed time

When HYDRA abducted her from her workshop, (Y/N) refused to tell them anything. Apparently, a man of theirs tried to steal the super soldier serum but got it destroyed instead and the doctor who created it has been killed in the process. God knows how, but they caught wind of her being affiliated with the project and assumed she would know the formula, at least a part of it. They weren't wrong, but she would die before telling them anything. There has been enough suffering caused by the war and, indirectly, by her through the weapons she had created. She would be damned if she helped create a Nazi super soldier army.

After about two months of 'light torture', they decided to step up their game. If she was going to be useless, they would use her as a test subject for a new interrogation method in the making and if she spilled her secrets then, it'd be a win win. And if not, well, they'd at least have some research results. But (Y/N) Stark was a proud woman and she refused to break.

They injected her with a so called 'super resistance serum' – something that made her body withstand even otherwise lethal wounds. Sadly, there has been no change in her pain resistance. It let them torture her in ways unimaginable and she would still stay alive. Inhumane but definitely effective if you wanted to force someone to spill their secrets. It was the definition of pain worse than death.

She didn't know how long they kept her there but one day she decided to just try and escape. What was the worst that could happen? Maybe the serum would stop working and she'd just die from her injuries, but who cared? That would be salvation if anything. And so, a plan hatched in her head.

It took a long time, weeks, maybe over a month, she couldn't tell while being stuck in her cell and being experimented on, but finally, she was ready. It would hurt but she was sure she'd be able to get her restrains off, maybe at the cost of her wrist, but it would heal eventually. Everything did. During the experiments, they cut off her fingers, took her internal organs and it all grew back somehow. It usually took a few hours at most for her to be as good as new. So a wrist was nothing to worry about.

On that day, she braced herself as the scientist came in. She pretended to slowly start caving in during her preparations time and now, she would seemingly crack. When he asked whether she would finally tell him what he wanted to hear, she whispered incoherently. It was enough to catch his attention tho. Speaking very quietly, she forced him to come so close they almost touched. There was only one chance for her to do this right, so she took one last breath, eyes focused on a specific point on his neck. The artery.

She really thought she could escape, that she had a chance, but once the door was locked and ice started filling up the room, she knew she lost. Well, not entirely. It would finally kill her, she would probably stay here forever. No more pain, no more torture and HYDRA would never know what they wanted to find out through her. She won this fight.

Her only regret was that she would never ever give Steve Rogers the dance she promised him what felt like years ago, never see him or her dearest brother again. But with this sacrifice, they would have a much greater chance at surviving – without super soldiers on the enemy's side. She smiled bitterly to herself. So why did she feel so guilty? She was ready to die so why did it hurt so fucking much?

Experiment #15687: ended in May 1944

FAILED

***

"After I woke up and Tony filled me in on everything, I felt lost. My brother was long gone, I was physically younger than my own nephew despite officially being 94 years old and... I have been proclaimed dead decades ago. Almost no one I used to know remained alive and those that did were surely very old now, they might have long forgotten me. I didn't want to see them like that, see them die of old age while I was still here, living on borrowed time. And it wouldn't be fair towards them either. I left them to fight that war alone, how would it be justifiable to enjoy the age of peace they fought so hard for, while I was frozen somewhere underground? Leaving them to suffer?