in our love, there was solace

chapter 2

tw : mild panic attack (?)

shuhua was everything competent. shuhua was everything soojin wasn't.

shuhua, she was right, she was captivating, she was an absolute sweetheart many adored in this bitter world.

whereas soojin, her life—it's a mess. her parents finally separated after years of endorsement. her mental health was draining more and more because of the person her heart ached for.

and that person was infront of her right now.

the seniors were having a free period, soojin being the delinquent that she was, decided that she needed a cigarette after an hour long of math. it wasn't like she was the only one doing that anyway. most seniors would usually wander around the campus during free periods anyway.

howbeit soojin really needed a break. from everything.

damn those prefects that get to skip class just to do their duties, soojin envied them.

just as she was about to leave by the back door, she spotted a familiar back.

she walked over to the tall prefect who was probably getting names  for her duty. without acknowledging who lisa was talking to, the younger senior glided past the thai's waist as she manipulated her apps in her phone.

"would this siren like to puff some cigs with me?" soojin invited with a light tone, ignoring whoever was infront of her.

soojin was one to have a mindset of i-dont-give-a-fuck-about-eveything-and-anything but she still stayed lowkey with that attitude. though when someone bursts her bubble up, she wouldn't hesitate to beat the other individual up.

with the silence that followed, soojin finally lifted her head up, not wanting to anticipate an answer for too long. being unaware of two pairs of eyes staring at her for too long, soojin finally made eye contact with the yeh shuhua.

her teeth were going to crack. her jaw is clenched so tight from the pain that shuhua swears she can hear her teeth giving way under the pressure. somewhere infront of her is a voice, but she can’t focus long enough to make out what it’s saying.

"i-i should uh probably leave." unaccompanied by another word, lisa wriggled out of soojin's hold and backed up. then slowly leaving the two alone.

both of them locked eyes, one with a sense of guilt and regret, the other with sorrow and... jealousy?

had soojin interpreted wrongly?

no.

she was jealous. so jealous she was gritting her teeth and trying to tear her eyes away from soojin's arm that just touched another person who wasn't her and she was being an absolute masochist and not letting herself do that.

shuhua breathes deep. in and out, she lets the air flow, tries to maneuver her shallow breaths into something easier, be it more calculated. 

they’re both going through a lot. too much, if you ask for shuhua’s opinion.

shuhua knew all things about soojin down to details. shuhua knew how she only drink iced americano with half a cube of sugar, forty percent ice. shuhua knew how much soojin disliked eating cherry though it was her 'thing'. shuhua knew how soojin liked to be taken care of after a hungover— drinking honey tea as she was held tightly in shuhua's warm embrace.

of course shuhua knew what was going on at her home. shuhua knew how much she affected soojin mentally and physically. shuhua knew how much their heart yearned for each other for the past months.