(Ticcimask) One In The Same

New Dilemmas

      Ever since Toby hypothesized that he was crushing hard on Tim, it was getting difficult to not act like a hot mess around him. The teen did everything in his power to keep calm and distance himself away from the senior. At lunch, he'd pick the opposite side of wherever the darker brunette would sit. Hanging out at Brian or Alex's place, he'd elected to sit on the floor in the far corner every single time, with no chance of the man sitting by him. Toby knew that this probably wasn't the most helpful or graceful of tactics, but the supposed alternative just seemed so much worse!

In his mind, Toby's little crush could ruin the group dynamic. Tim would probably find him too young or too immature, he seemed nice enough to let Toby down gently. But, if that was the case— or if they got together and broke up, it would only make things uncomfortable between them all. The biggest factor in his decision so far, was this; He was a lanky, jittery, twitchy, awkward sophomore with a boat load of mental illnesses in addition to his physical oddities.

Who was he kidding?

Of course Tim wouldn't reciprocate his affections! What of Toby's affections anyway? This was probably just a fluke, Tim was nice to everyone, he wasn't an exception. This was because the teen was inexperienced. There were no feelings to feel!

So, it was for the better of everyone to hold back and let it pass.

         It wasn't so bad though. In between dodging any kind of physical contact with Tim, Toby had been slowly but surely warming up to everyone else. This was pretty thrilling to Brian, who took every opportunity he could to coax the teen into hanging out with them as much as possible. Toby was starting to feel like he belonged, everyone had been so kind to him.

Jay was a big help when it came to homework on subjects he didn't understand. Always chipping in and offering to lend a hand in between multitasking as script supervisor, as well as his own school work.

Alex was basically a vigilante older brother. He would go out of his way to make sure Toby was comfortable or occupied while the others worked on the script, so as to not let Toby feel left out. Alex had even asked for input a few times when Brian let it slip that Toby and Tim did very well in creative writing. Toby wasn't sure if Alex took the tips, but the college freshmen seemed to be engaged by his ideas enough.

As for Seth, Seth kept a respectable distance in all of this. He elected to show Toby how visual recording worked and how to make a tape. But, being as they were both so quiet, they didn't feel the further need to dive into an in depth conversation. Which was perfectly acceptable between the two of them.

However, for as much as Toby was learning about his new friends, he never gave them the chance to really open up about his family life. They didn't need to know about the estranged relationship with him and his dad, his over protective yet codependent mother, and his departed sister.

He didn't need to disclose any other information about why he had been kept out of public school for so long either.

Toby definitely didn't need them to hand out additional pity points. He already felt like his tics and stutter held him back from feeling completely accepted. The last thing he wanted was to be treated differently by actual decent people.

Yeah, this was fine.

           It was about four in the afternoon as the two seniors and sophomore were driving down the barren cul de sac, once again. Toby informed his friends that his mom urged him to come home early. Something about having a day off and wanting to get together for a family dinner. The first one in a long while.

As Tim watched the teen wave goodbye while retreating down the sidewalk, he took a deep breath and rummaged around his pockets for a light. "C'mon man," Brian protested while turning up his nose with slight disgust. Tim lit the tobacco stick regardless and helped himself to a hefty drag.