TELL ME WHAT'S WRONG (sakuatsu)

fifteen:

sakusa

i just shake my head and ignored suna who's still recording me. when i feel like i'm done stretching my wrist i stand up.

"commercial's done!" i said and went to our manager to get one jersey

"you really love wearing 15, kiyo." komori said

"it's my jersey number."

"is that really the reason? is it not the sum of 10 and 5? you know october 5, someone's birthday!" he said smirking at me

"i thought i should move on, komori?"

"right, sorry!"

coach claps so loud and it echoed so we all turn to look at him. i got frozen when i saw who's standing next to him. i look away before our eyes met.

"miya's here, so komori's team go and get your setter now." coach said so i gulp so hard

when did he came back? i didn't know and komoro never told me. maybe komori also don't have an idea. someone tapped on my shoulder so i look at him, it's suna.

"are you ok, sakusa? you can still play? i can make a story to coach that you got a severe headache." he said giving me concerned look so i shake my head

"i'm fine, suna. don't worry!"

"what about your heart? is he ok?"

suna knows about my past relationship with atsumu because komori can't keep his mouth shut. he also knows about what happened between me and wakatoshi. he also told me that osamu knew i dated his brother.

"kiyo—"

"i'm fine, komori! i can just ignore him, right?" i said and went to  my position

when the match started i tried so hard not to look on his way. when the ball came to me i just hit it like i usually do. i didn't heard him called my name so i just call for the ball and hit it.

the game ended with kageyama and hinata's team winning. we're now doing the punishments because we lost to them. we're given 50 jump serves as punishment and when the ball went out it's not counted.

komori did 50 dig receive with the winning team's jump serves as his punishment since libero can't do serves. when we're all done i lay down on the of floor of the gym.

"i just came back and ya already gave me punishments? so cruel." we heard miya whined so everyone, except me and the expressionless wakatoshi, laughs at him

"that's because you suck, atsumu!" suna said that made them laugh louder

"shut up, sunarin!"

"you shut up, atsumu!"

"whatever! but seriously, punishment on my first day in practice?"

"you still have punishments waiting for you for tomorrow and next practices." hoshiumi said

"wow, i'm touched! shut up, hoshi!"

i sit up and asked komori for some water. i'm thirsty and so tired right now. i'm soaked in sweat and it's so disgusting.

"you want towel, sakusa? don't worry it's new and clean!" yaku said so i accepted the towel that he's giving me

"thank you!"

i used the towel yaku gave me to wipe my sweats away. i want to dry my back too woth the towel but i can't reach it. someone snatched the towel from my hand and he dries my back.

"how are you, sakusa?" i stiffen when i heard miya asked me

he's the one who's drying.my back right now. i scan the whole gym to look for komoro and suna. they're both looking at us, looks so worried and concerned.

"how have ya been?" he asked again

i don't know what to say to him. i don't know how to answer that question. feels like there's a lump in my throat and it's stopping the words to come out from my mouth.

"ya still don't want to talk to me, i see. anyway, you're back is already dry. it's so nice to see you again." he said before he left me

the breathe i am holding finally came out when he left. i can see my hands shaking and my eyes are starting to become blurry because of the tears that wants to escape from my eyes.

"komori." i whispered my cousins name when he pulls me for a hug.

"shh!"

he and suna guided me and helped.me.to sit on the bench on the corner of the gym. the tears i tried so hard to conceal made their own way out of my eyes.

"sakusa…"

"kiyo…"

"i missed him, komori, suna. i missed him so much that i want to pull him for a hug when i saw him standing next to coach. i missed him so much that i want to kiss him when he talked to me. i missed him so much and i want him back so bad." i said, crying my heart out on their shoulders

"i know, sakusa. we all know that you missed him. that you want him. that you need him. and that you still love him." suna said making circles on my back

"but we can't force him to get back to you. especially if he's dating someone now. we want you to be happy with him again but we don't know how to do it." komoro said

i bite my lower lips to stop myself from letting a sob. i'm holding my own hands to stop it from shaking. i can barely see because of the tears in my eyes.

"i love him."