Refractive Errors

Chapter 5

Mark was upset. It had been a few days since they'd met up with YugYeom and his schedule was only getting more hectic. They'd been doing mock-interviews all day, working on answering questions and being fun while also maintaining a certain persona. The longer it went on, the more confused he became. Not sure how to answer questions or keep the conversations going since he wasn't sure which words could and couldn't be used. His persona as the eldest and most put together wasn't working out, nor was the strong silent type, they told him to play the adorable fakenae... but nothing was working. Trying to find something for him turned out to be the hardest part of his day, there were stylists, managers, trainees, and countless other people surrounding him all day, demanding things from him, and he was ready to disappear.

There was a lull in decision-making and he was dismissed for the day. Taking it as a gift he rushed down to the car and waited for the rest of the guys. Sitting there with no one around but his thoughts he felt himself starting to crack. There was so much pressure to be perfect and lately he'd felt anything but.

JaeBeom and JinYoung already had their things, they were the original group and had been doing this far longer than anyone else. YoungJae had an incredible voice and picked up the dances so quickly, all the instructors praised him for his ability to keep his voice steady while moving his body at the same time. BamBam was adorable and young, his rapping skills surpassing the American's and on par with Jackson's. The youngest in their group was made to be an idol with his looks and over the top personality. Jackson was talented in every aspect, there wasn't a day that went by he wasn't picking up a new skill or asked for his input when it came to something. When the guys practiced they made an amazing group with such great chemistry it was easy to see why they'd been put in a group together.

He was clearly the odd one out, he didn't pick up the dances as fast, he had no idea what most of the instructors and managers were saying to him, his dancing always needed improvement, his songs were too American. He was too thin, but then he was too fat, he had odd shaped eyes, and his canine teeth were too long. There was always something to pick apart, and he was starting to feel it. Retreating further into himself and finding it harder and harder to want to be friends with the people he was surrounded by.

His thoughts were cut off by the opening of the door, his driver getting in to take him home. "It's just you today, the rest are still working." The kind older man said, giving Mark a slight bow before starting their drive.

"Do you mind taking me by the park?" Mark asked tentatively, he needed to be able to walk around and breath, having been inside and surrounded by people all day had clearly taken a toll on the young man. He was an introvert after all, and desperately needed a break.

Without even thinking about it, their driver took him towards the park. He'd picked Mark up there a few times, always seeing the younger with another young man, but knowing to keep his curiosity to himself. Pulling up to the park he looked around and found it mostly empty, a few families spread out here and there. "Would you like me to wait for you?" He asked, knowing he wasn't supposed to let the trainees go around by themselves.

Mark agreed, slipping out the door and heading towards the benches lining the wall of trees planted on the one side. The setting sun painting everything in light pinks and oranges as he watched the world move around him. Something so peaceful rested over him, as he watched the world around him shift and change. Just sitting there, pretending he was in America at the park near his school. Imagining going home to his Mama's delicious food or his Baba's mouthwatering barbecue. Seeing Amanda in the living room with a smile just for him, whispered conversations with Tammy about the latest movie they'd snuck out to see, teasing Joey about his crush while his brother blushed and asked the best way to ask a girl out.

"Is this seat taken?" He heard a familiar gruff voice ask. Looking up, he found JaeBeom standing beside him. Shaking his head silently he went back to watching the park. The two sitting in companionable silence. JaeBeom was the most like Mark, in the fact neither felt the need to talk in order to be heard. It made times like this quite nice, although they both had short tempers and had been in plenty of fights.

It didn't take long for their silence to be broken though, neither man cared. "HYUUUUNNNNGGGGG!!!!!" YugYeom yelled, his brother standing at his elbow and helping guide him towards the two. The elder Kim was shaking his head and smiling endearingly at his younger brother, so it was clear he didn't mind all the extra attention on the pair. Mark's face split into the most wholesome smile at the sound of YugYeom's nasally and over excited call. It was such a rare sight for Mark, the normally quiet and reserved male didn't show his true feelings often. The members of GOT6 having noticed his shell growing stronger in the last few days.

"Hello." JaeBeom greeted once both males had gotten closer, watching with barely concealed curiosity as Mark and YugYeom began to wrestle with each other playfully. YugYeom's head shooting up at the sound and looking in the direction of his voice. Mark just growled and pulled the younger into a headlock effectively capturing his attention once more. JaeBeom couldn't help but smile, the effortlessness with which Mark exchanged skinship and smiles with the younger was amazing. It was like watching Mark and Jackson goof around when the staff were gone.

Mark could tell he was acting like an idiot, but he didn't care. His new friend was there and he didn't have to feel pressured to be anyone right then. He wasn't the eldest son of the Tuan's, he wasn't the kid from America that had been a gangster (not that he was ever), he didn't need to act put together and grown up, he didn't need to be anything or anyone. He was simply Mark.