Since AO3 isn't letting me use more than 75 tags, I'm writing this.

Part 1

Wile E. Coyote had accidentally texted his ex boyfriend while drunk. He stared at the text log and regretted every choice that led up to this point. He regretted spending his entire life chasing a roadrunner who might have been at the same intelligence level as an actual animal. He regretted agreeing to let Bugs Bunny take over while The Roadrunner was away. He regretted that week they dated. He regretted the messy break-up that followed. He regretted going back to That Roadrunner and thinking only of That One Roadrunner as if nothing had happened. He regretted getting drunk last night and trying to sleep with his object of obsession, he regretted getting mad after he had been denied and going to his ex. Now he was sitting at a fried chicken restaurant like he promised to do last night, with his only company being the bones of his fried chicken until his ex came. If his ex was coming at all. Personally speaking, Wile would have just not come but wasn't interested in sending a bunch of drunken texts only to not show up. He should explain himself at least, say that he was drunk and he was still chasing The Roadrunner. That he did feel that way for Bugs once upon a time a long long time ago in a far away land that neither of them could return to. That in the end, despite wishing he didn't he was always in love with The Roadrunner.

Wile Coyote went over the conversation in his head again. He kept getting stuck in the scenarios where Bugs Bunny flirted with him or made a move on him. Well the romantic feelings had been burnt by their break up, the sexual feelings had remained. Hell, even the romantic feelings could probably be washed of the ashes and restarted. Although it just end the same way and he'd still be in love with that damnedable bird. That damnedable bird with his stupid noises, and animalistic idiotic behavior, and his dumb hot ass... God, why was he like this? He'd never catch him and the millions of failures proved it as crystal clear as the blue skies in the desert. Yet as soon as he stepped out the door, doubtlessly he convince himself that he could do it this time and the chase would begin again.

The door opened and rang telling everyone in the chicken restaurant that someone had entered. The brown coyote looked over to the gray hare was in clothes as if he didn't want to be discovered for who he was. Sunglasses, a oversized hat, trench coat, everything. He had only realized it was him by his cotton tail poking out of the behind. Simply a master of costume and disguise.The gray bunny sat across from him and picked up a menu. The brown canine noted sharply, "You are one hour late." Most people believe him silent but he was fully capable of speaking, he just normally didn't have to. The gray rabbit pointed out firmly, "I have a husband now, and a job."

The desert coyote snarked, "I'm sure Daffy will understand." He was about to say more but he wasn't able to. The words caught in his throat as he felt a hand on his knee. Bugs had always been the affectionate type. Always kissing enemies and lovers and friends alike. Always flirting with enemies and friends and lovers all the same. One could barely tell where they stood with him on the first few meetings. To the point where he would just end up saying what they were to him after a while. Still, many toons were like that. It was often a Cartoon would become enemies with someone only for that person to end up believing they were dating. The touch lasted a moment more before the bunny rabbit asked, "Would you like me to stop?" The canine whispered, "Please keep going." He knew shouldn't have encouraged it but he was so desperate. He was so very desperate for a touch, he hadn't been touched in so long. Sure as Hell, Roadrunner hadn't touched him in that time. The off yellow gloved hands moved up his leg, settling on the inner thigh and rubbing there. The coyote wolf dog? grew so "excited" that he humped the hand. Fortunately nobody was really around to see, still he whispered in pleading, "Keep going, go further up, please go further."

The hand pulled away after a few more seconds, leaving him needy. That's when he saw The Roadrunner standing there. Somehow he had followed him and gotten in. The shame welled up to almost bursting. Bugs dashed off and he gave a few parting words, "I shouldn't have come. Daffy will wonder where I am." The Roadrunner looked at him, frowned and left as well. He was alone again and he had ruined his relationships with the only men he could say he ever loved with only his chicken bones as company.

Fin