Deranged

Feelings

I sat there on the floor waiting for what seemed to be hours. My eyes dry from tears that I had been crying.
Still no sign of Luke. It worried me. This was my start of a proper relationship with him. I was in love, he was in love. If he was gone, I couldn't just walk back home and say "here I am."
I hadn't spoke a word, yet who was I supposed to speak too?
Birds chirping outside of the little cabin, critters such as squirrels running around on the roof.
Dust flew around in the ray of sunlight that was coming in through a crack in the wooden walls.
The door creaked open and a tall figure peered in.
"Caitlyn?"
The voice was familiar. It was Luke. I stood up and ran to him. My body colliding with his. My arms wrapped around his chest. His face buried into my shoulder.
His warm breath sending chills throughout my body.
"I thought-" I started to say as Luke cut me off.
"Shh, don't think about it. I'm here, holding you, in my arms, right now." He said to me.
The tears falling faster and much more.
I didn't want to think about it. But I did. I couldn't stop. I couldn't not think about it.
"I'm sorry." He said to me as he squeezed tighter.
"Wh-what happened?" I said to him as I looked up to him.
His blue eyes gleaming down on me.
"Nothing." He said to me.
I wanted to know, but I had just got Luke back. I wasn't about to lose him again by asking to many questions.
I smiled at him.
He let go of me and looked around. His eyes scanning everything.
He looked at me, "How did you manage to find this place?" He asked as he continued to look.
I shrugged my shoulders. "I don't know. I just kept running." I looked down, "And I didn't look back."
Tears formed in my eyes, before rolling down my cheek. I sniffled and rubbed my nose with my sleeve of the sweater I grabbed from my closet.
"I'm sorry, I just.." I started, "I thought I lost you. You didn't come an I feared you weren't going to come. I'm not ready to lose you."
We sat down together as Luke held my hand. He rubbed his thumb against my skin.
I was completely honest. I was scared. I was scared of losing him. I didn't want too.
Every thought of it made me shake. Made me wonder, but I didn't know what I was wondering. It had seemed like I was wandering through fields of guilt. But guilt about what?
What was making it so hard to figure out?
What or who was i figuring out?

Authors note: ok, so sorry for the short chapter but I was SOO lost on this one omf I wish you knew! But my bday is on the 20th woo woo! Haha, um please like and comment. I love you all