natasha romanoff oneshots

you're allowed to want things too pt.1

hi (: I managed to upload again haha and this one is 1k words. there shouldnt be any warnings tbh, just natasha being kind of a butthole cause she likes reader but doesnt know how to express her feelings. ill make a part two for this one
the line means that its a timeskip if that isnt obvious
^^

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You sat on a worn down mattress, a blanket draped over your shoulders. You were assigned to be on a stakeout mission with Natasha, and the atmosphere felt awkward. The both of you used to be rather good friends, but one day after Natasha came back from a mission; she no longer showed interest in you. She avoided you at all cost, and now here you two were; stuck in a shitty apartment together for a mission.

Natasha leaned against the window, staring outside and looking irritated. Her eyebrow was furrowed and her jaw was clenched. She barely spoke to you and when she did, she wasn't too kind. You wanted to at least know why she suddenly grew to dislike you, but you didn't feel like confronting her about it. The last thing you needed was to get in a fight with someone you were stuck with for an unknown amount of time. So you just sucked it up, and pulled out a book to read.
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A week passed, and the same awkward silence and Natasha acting like she could barely tolerate being around you continued. You had it. You had just been sitting there glancing at her until you got the courage to speak.

"Are you mad at me?" you asked quietly. You regret speaking the instant she turned around with a scowl on her face.

She just stared at you for a moment before responding. "Really? Just because I don't feel like being friends with you doesn't mean that I'm mad," Natasha scoffed, crossing her arms.

"You don't think you could at least be kind of nicer to me? You're acting like you would rather eat glass than be here with me," you retorted, frowning back at her.

"I would rather eat glass than be here with you."

You grimaced at her words, deciding that it was, in fact, a mistake talking to her. Natasha seemed to regret her words but didn't know how to amend what she just said to you.

"Okay, I didn't mean it like that," Natasha paused, chewing the inside of her cheek and looking away. "I just would rather not be on a stakeout mission. We don't get to do anything but look out a window and stay put until we're allowed to leave."

Natasha hesitated, then spoke again. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine, don't apologise for being honest," you replied flatly. Maybe you misunderstood that you weren't friends at all.

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Your mission with Natasha ended about a week ago. There was no intel about the people you were looking for in the area, so after about three weeks of doing nothing you were allowed to go home. For now, you also lived in the compound that Tony owned.

You didn't talk to Natasha anymore like you used to. It was pointless and you felt embarrassed that you thought you were friends and she implied she only saw you as her coworker.

In the morning, you headed to the shared kitchen to make yourself breakfast. When you looked in the fridge, you noticed that someone ate the groceries you bought. More specifically, the food you wanted to eat that morning. You sighed and shut the fridge, just taking a granola bar to eat and heading back to your room to relax on your day off.

Natasha had watched that entire thing. She remembered what you liked to eat in the morning, and part of her still felt guilty about what she said. Natasha got her keys and begrudgingly got up to go make a trip to the grocery store and buy you food as another silent apology.

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Later when you went to look in the fridge for food, you stood at the entrance and saw Natasha putting away groceries into the fridge. She had a sharpie and wrote your name down onto the foods she bought for you, and then put them away. It made you smile, but you decided to just let her be for the moment.

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The next day, Natasha found you asleep on the couch. She stared at you for a moment, and then she got a nearby blanket to drape it over your body. Natasha walked away shortly after, not wanting to be teased by Tony for being nice to you.
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Natasha woke up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat. She had a nightmare, again. She used to go to your room and sit with you whenever this happened, but now she felt like she wasn't allowed to do that anymore. She sighed heavily, rubbing her eyes and getting out of bed to head into the living room. Natasha locked eyes with you, since you were sitting on the couch and wrapped up in a blanket. You had been watching a tv show before Natasha walked in.

Natasha turned to leave, but before she could, you patted the spot beside where you were sitting to encourage her to come sit. Natasha hesitated but ended up sitting with you, watching as you spread out the blanket and covered her too. Her chest felt heavy with guilt again.

"Are we still friends?" Natasha asked quietly, staring at you with a small frown.

You shrugged, turning down the volume on the tv slightly. "I'd like to say we are, but you're confusing me. Stop moping around and talk to me," you replied lightly, nudging her shoulder. "We used to hang out all the time and then you started acting pissed at me. Did I do something?"

Natasha shook her head no and sighed, rubbing her temple.

"You never did anything wrong. I just haven't been feeling myself lately. I'm sorry."

You didn't press for any more details, leaning into Natasha's side tentatively. She didn't pull away, so you took her hand to trace her fingers and any rings she was wearing like you used to. Natasha's heart fluttered and she didn't know what to do, just tensing slightly beside you. Natasha felt relieved of the guilt now, knowing that you weren't mad.

"Did you have a nightmare tonight?"

"Yeah."

"Do you want to finish watching that episode from last time?" You hummed, glancing up at her. She gave a small smile and nodded, so you took the remote and switched the show you currently had on.

Natasha just sat there with you that night, letting you lean against her and trace her fingertips. Her face felt warm, just enjoying your affection. Natasha couldn't pay attention to the show that was currently on, but that was fine. She found you more captivating anyways.