Oh, How Lovely~ Lams

15.

"Martha?" John asked, looking at the woman in the kitchen.

She turned around, looking at John. "God- I've been waiting forever." Martha laughed softly, taking her grilled cheese off of the stove.

John turned around, picking Philip up. "What are you doing here?" He asked, shutting the door and holding Philip.

Martha bit her lip, turning the stove off and going to John. "I just... I missed you and Philip. I wanted to come back." She shrugged. "I think... I'm ready to be here to stay."

"Papa.." Philip whined, wanting to get the attention of his father. He wasn't paying attention to Martha, just wanting to spend time with John.

"Aye, lil man. You're alright. Give me a second and we can watch Nemo." John said to him, kissing his head.

"Philip. Oh god- you've gotten so big." Martha said, reaching her arms out for John to put him in her arms.

"I don't-" John started, shaking his head.

"Please? I am his mom." Martha said, giving John pleading eyes.

John debated it, a worried look on his face, before nodding. "Okay, baby. I'm gonna hand you over." He whispered to Philip, still a bit standoffish as he handed him to Martha.

"Hey, buddy." Martha smiled, holding Philip in her arms.

"Hi!" Philip said, only somewhat recognizing her. He knew she was the lady from pictures but he couldn't remember the last time she was there.

"Hi, my baby! It's been so long. I missed you!" Martha said, kissing his cheek a couple times. "You're getting so big!" She smiled.

Philip nodded. "Pippy's two!" He told her, holding up two finger's.

"Oh goodness! Such a big boy!" Martha said.

"It's Papa and Pippy time." Philip told her. "We're watching Finding Nemo!"

"Oh, Finding Nemo!" Martha said. "Okay, well is it okay if Mommy joins in Papa and Pippy time?" She asked.

Philip nodded. "Okay." He said, moving around so Martha would put him down. He went to the couch and crawled on, sitting and waiting.

"Martha... I-" John started, looking down. Martha walked up to him, putting her hands in his unzipped jacket.

"I know. I know... Just, why don't we talk when Philip lays down?" She asked, moving her hands and grabbing each of John's with her own so they were holding hands.

John bit the inside of his cheek, just looking at her for a moment before nodding gently.

Martha waited a moment before releasing his hands and sitting on the couch with Philip. He was sitting, sucking on his thumb as he waited for the television to be put on and Finding Nemo to start.

John swallowed hard, going to the small television and turning on Disney+. His mom paid for it, since his little sister liked watching the shows on their as well. He found the movie, sitting on the other side of Philip. He was nervous, it was obvious. Martha had been gone for six months and now she decided to return.

John gave Philip the food he brought home, letting him eat while watching the movie. He didn't eat much, which was normal for him. He was two, meaning his stomach wasn't yet adjusted to eating full meals, so he ate in mostly snacks throughout the day.

When he was done, John took the left overs and put them in the fridge. He looked at the time, noting that he had work in a few hours. He leaned on the counter and sighed, feeling pretty tense and stressed at the moment.

"John?" Martha said, walking into the kitchen. He lifted his head from his hands, looking at the woman. "Can we talk now?"

John looked to the couch, seeing Philip content on the couch. He nodded, looking back at Martha.

"I'm sorry." Martha started, as she had the three other times she came back from a hiatus.

"I just- I want to stay. I want to be Philip's mom and be here. Be a family." She said, reaching for both of his hands. "I wanna be your girl again." She shrugged, looking at him.

John chewed on the inside of his cheek, squeezing her hands gently.

"Martha, you're always gonna be my girl." John said softly, meaning it. Martha truly was the only person he had been in love with and he knew he could never really get over her.

"No matter what, you'll always be my girl." John stated, wrapping his arms around Martha and hugging her tightly.

Martha held onto John. "Thank you..." She whispered, touching their foreheads together and holding the back of his neck.

John closed his eyes, keeping his forehead on Martha. They stayed like that for a moment before he stepped back, looking at the time. "I got work soon." He explained.

"Okay," Martha nodded. "Who's watching Pip while you're working?" She asked. When she was still around, she would usually watch Philip while John worked, since Martha didn't work.

"I'm taking him with me." John explained.

"Oh... well, I'm here now. I can watch him." Martha suggested.

"I don't-" John started before being interrupted by Martha.

"Please? I'm his mother and I wanna spend time with Philip." Martha begged John.

"You had time to spend with him. You left, Martha. I just... I don't think I can leave lil man with you." John explained.

John looked at Martha, seeing how hurt she looked.

"I'm sorry, mami. Look... why don't I call in tonight and we just spend the night together?" John suggested, grabbing her hands gently.

Martha nodded softly, closing her eyes. "Okay, I get it." She sniffled, laying her head on his shoulder. John wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her for a moment.

"I'm gonna call the bar, mami. I'll be right back." He said, kissing her cheek before leaving and going into the bedroom.

John looked at his phone screen, seeing several text from Alex.

>> Hey, Jay. I have Lafayette's kids tonight and we are having a little sleepover. I wanted to see if you'd like Philip to come over? I can watch him while you're at work, if you'd like. Then maybe you can come over after? We don't have to have sex, maybe just hang out? I don't know, it's up to you. Just let me know :)<<

John smiled at the text, then that smile dropped into a slight frown. It was barely noticeable, even John not really realizing it.

>> i wish i could lex but i got plans tonight so im not gonna go to work. have fun tonight and ill see you later<<

John sighed a bit, wishing he could go to Alex's. He was very fond of the older man, more so than he even understood.

But now he was with Martha. He couldn't help the feeling he got when she was around. He couldn't help the feelings he had of her.

And he couldn't help that Martha was Philip's mom and John couldn't just not allow her around him.

Of all things in the world, John was only addicted to one: Martha Manning. And arguably, she was one of the worst.