I'm being torchered!

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"hello, and welcome to a lovely, gentle and peaceful video" y/n smiled sitting at her table in her little dress
".... Is it opposite day again? Or have you just finally lost it love?" Thomas spoke up as he sat beside her
She turned and glared at him leaving him looking rather afraid "I'm sorry darling"
"Thank you." She smiled "now Thomas what are we doing today?"
"I have no idea, I was just told to put pants on and sit at the table?"
"I wrote it on the schedule which is on the fridge"
"When do I look at the fridge?"
"Everyday to get milk to fill up your coffee machine"
"You think I'm in a mood to read? Before coffee? I didn't even speak to you until I've had coffee and your my wife"
"Okay" she sighed "so, recently a few celebrities have been releasing there own nail polish lines now this is not really news because it happens alot along with make up and clothing lines that celebrities come out with now the reason this has been getting attention is that a few of them are men"
"Okay?"
"Is it something you've considered Thomas? Releasing a nail polish line?"
"Not really no"
"What about a make up line?"
"Not really. Maybe one day when I move into directing maybe I'll release a vodka or something?"
"Maybe turn to wine making?"
"Yeah. That's like maybe the closest thing I'd do."
"Just release wines with weird names"
"No. I'd name them nice things, probably name one after you, and the girls would get a wine each, one after my mum yeah I'd be good"
"Anyway. I don't get why it's a big deal, okay for these male celebrities to come out with nail polish like it's no more interesting then katy perry coming out with nail polish."
"Tell us why y/n,"
"I think it's because, in my personal opinion. Things like nail polish and make up too make up comes into this, there is no reason for it to be gendered, really it isn't gendered like you don't get like ladies polish or ladies lipstick it's just stuff anyone can use it, I mean colouring your nails especially to thats not just a female thing men and women did it though put history same with make up, there's no reason they should be considered as gendered a man can we're nail polish and look great, a man can where make up, hell some wear it better then some women."
"You so think clothes are gendered thought don't you?"
"Certain clothes. Yes." She nods "but that's more of a design thing though. Like underwear, boxers are designed for cocks wear as panties are designed for pussys, a woman can wear boxers and a man can wear panties it they want I don't care but i don't have an issue with gendering them because they have a different design maybe don't gender them but"
"Diferenciate"
"Yeah" she nods "I've worn boxers before there fine still comfy but like a bra is designed for boobs, if you have boobs probably wear a bra."
"I do know some men who honestly of you gave them a bra they might be better off because they do have boobs. I've worn your underwear before... It wasn't fun, because for that reason its not designed for my anatomy"
"You didn't wanna say your dick did you?"
"I did not no, maybe get rid of men's and women's and just have"
"For pussy, for dick"
"Yeah"
"Make it different for like comfort not anything else"
"Or maybe someone needs to develop like genderless designs?"
"Yeah maybe. But like men wearing dresses, I don't care do it if you want to, I've heard people say it's comfy like compared to something like skinny jeans"
"Yeah, I imagine so. Because I imagine its like when you only have a towel or like loose fitting sweatpants, just cosy and comfy"
"Yeah, and anyone man, woman or fucking toaster wants to get in a pair of heels. Do so. If you want that torcher then go for it mate,"
"Yeah, I feel that way about bras wear whatever you want, and if you choose to wear one of those fuckers then I applaud you because having worn a bra for a week I can attest they are horrible"
"This was a long rant"
"It was"
"Now! Today. I am going to paint your nails"
"Ohh. That's why I'm here. Okay. Can I choose?"
"Yes you can" she smiled throwing a tub of likely hundreds of nail polishes in the table
"This may take time."

"Have you selected Thomas?"
"Yes! I have it may have took some time that I hope sally will edit out"
"What did you choose?"
"I chose black to be edgy, then a cool what do you call this?"
"Unicorn skin. Or iridescent flakes"
"Yes. You said to keep it fairly simple so I did."
"I'm still surprised you didn't pick the crackle effect one"
"Yeah but I've seen you with it and I know you can't like control how it cracks so sometimes one nail looks shit"
"Yeah that's true. Are ready?"
"I think so."
"Good, I will point out I cleaned his jail before this. Because.... Mostly just because I wanted to be sure" she says as she began to work
"My nails where that bad"
"I've seen them worse, but you had just changed the girls so I wanted to make doubly sure"
"That's fair. What are you doing to me?"
"I'm oiling your cuticles"
"My who what's?"
"Sshhhhh Thomas" she says
"Owww! Owww! What are you doing that hurts!"
"Shhhh"
"Owww! Owwwwww! I'm being torchered!" He yelped
"You big baby." She giggled "there I stopped. Now it's filing time"
"Do you need to file my nails? I thought they where okay?"
"I need to file an edge or too yeah then we base coat"
"Ooohh that's weird that is a weird sensation"
"You file your nails?"
"Ish. I file them when they bug me. Mostly I bite them"
"I know. Bad boy do not bite your nails!"
"I can't help it. It's automatic at this point. Especially then I want a ciggertte"
"You have started with toothpicks now which is good"
"Yeah, it helps because it gives my hands and mouth something to do. So I don't smoke"
"You've been doing really good actually. At cutting down" she says base coat time."
"Yeah, down to a pack per two weeks which is pretty damn good"
"I recall one point in our lives you literally got thought like a pack per two days"
"I did. I feel better now though for cutting down a bit especially with the girls around, I did my best while you where pregnant, basically made a rule I only smoked outside in the shed and I changed my jacket before I came back in the house."
"And I thank you for that Thomas"
"Well I had to for the girls. Plus you have asthma anyway so there was a good chance one of them would end up with it too"
"That's true. No tells as of yet if either do but going to make sure to monitor them" she explained "now we too coat or taco as Cristine says"
"She's the nail lady you watch"
"She is. I also have slme of her nail polish because tis good shit" she explained "all done! Do you feel beautiful Thomas?"
"My hands feel heavy"
"They will till you get use to it"
"They look cool and you did a good job, in just concerned now that I can't bite my nails. And that I can't see if there dirty because I can't see those my nails anymore. But they look lovely thank you dear"
"Your welcome. Now can we do a video where I do your make up?"
"Nope."

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