Hidden Pride

Senpai

Watching you from afar
So close yet I can't have you
Oh senpai why won't you notice me
What am I doing wrong
Why can't I be good enough
I feel nothing at all
Emotions are an idle playground
Yet I feel everything around you
It's as if you reprogrammed me.
But SHE wants you.
She won't stop.
I need you.
I have to have you.
And I will stop at nothing to get you.
I will be yours.
YOU WILL BE MINE.
I will kill anyone who dares to insult or love you like I do.
I want the blood of my enemies drenched in my clothes.
The fear of death in their eyes as I tell them they can't have you.
I want to be sane.
Be normal but I can't
I only know one way
My brain is filled with you
Itd be much easier just to speak to you
But I can't
I can't face rejection
But I can't let you have anyone but me
My emotions are filled with strangeness
I can't feel anything except the strong urge for your love.
My condition is unkempt yet I hide it.
Hide away the shame.
Hide away the hidden secrets
I feel myself slipping slower and slower into insanity.
Smudges around my vision.
People turning into silhouettes.
Sounds slowed down
Yet the sweet feeling of murder.
The lust to kill. The urge is so delicious.
I can't tell anyone apart.
The only person I see is you.
Senpai....please help me.

Senpai....please help me
I murdered them
Deep down I know it freaks you out
But I can't help it.
The way they looked at you
I felt something other than intense love
I felt anger and a lust to kill
My boiling point reaching 100
So I lied to them telling them to meet me in the empty janitors closet
I kidnapped them....
Tortured and killed
And I still felt nothing
I only saw hallucinations of myself
Killing them over and over
I tried my best to never let you see
I tried to confess my love
But you were scared of me
Frightened by what you saw
These padded walls surrounding me may keep me away
This straitjacket holding me hostage from you
But it'll never change the fact that I love you
I will do what it takes to get you
I don't care if the love isnt mutual
You belong to me
And I'll murder anyone who thinks otherwise
Just like my mother did
So have fun senpai
But remember...... YOU'RE MINE