Soon All the Suns Will Rise

Even Though the Moment Passed Me By

Chapter title from "Name" by Goo Goo Dolls. Adapted excerpts from "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows" by J.K Rowling; song lyrics quoted from "Back in Black" by AC/DC.

Battle of Hogwarts
POV: Sirius Part II
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The moment the Resurrection Stone hit the chilly ground, Sirius felt himself slip fully back into the bruised and bleeding shell that was his current body. His mind clamored to go back to Harry, but it was impossible. With the stone dropped from the boy's grasp, their already shaky, wispy tether was severed beyond repair. A sob emanated from Sirius's chest, damp and raspy from the dewy early morning air.

The Invisibility Cloak had been the first to fall, a faint rustle on the tall spring grass. Sirius had caught a glimpse of Harry's desperate expression, such a complex mix of resolve, terror, and the keen appreciation of one who was seeing the corporeal world for the very last time. The boy's Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed the last of his fear, and Sirius only saw the split second where the Resurrection Stone separated from Harry's palm, like the moment when orange flame gives way to final gasps of smoke.

"Fuck, fuck, FUCK!" Broken moans turned to an angry shout, and Sirius jostled his aching body to standing position, immediately leaning into the cold stone wall for support.  His battle injuries were compounded by his mistake of sitting still for too long, crouched in the tiny spot at the base of the secret Hogwarts staircase. He needed to get moving again to numb the pain with purpose, so he began hobbling up the winding, seeming endless ascent.

Harry had to be gone by now. The contemplative Dark Lord had been at the center of the waiting Death Eater hoard, Bellatrix humbled at his feet, two enormous giants flanking the ranks and ready to act. The rest of the black-robed mass had faded into a blur of masked and not, a few key players like Dolohov and Yaxley at the forefront, along with Lucius and Narcissa, both pale and gaunt and completely drained. Sirius knew the minute the cloak hit the ground that the Killing Curse was imminent. Voldemort wouldn't waste time grandstanding this time, not when he'd already suffered so many failures.

The moment for which Sirius had longed for nearly two years had passed him by. Sure, he'd done what Remus had requested: "Dying?" Sirius had clarified with his trademark cavalier confidence. "Not at all. Quicker and easier than falling asleep." And he could indeed say that confidently, for it had been. Death wasn't something to be feared by the one bound for its clutches, only by those who were left behind. The pain Sirius felt now was worse than anything inflicted by his sadistic cousin or the Veil into which she'd sent him stumbling. Missed opportunities with Harry, Remus and Tonks now gone -- those things were far worse.

The breath had left Sirius's stinging lungs by the time he reached the crest of the stairs, for it took far more exertion than normal to lumber through exhaustion and injury. He then began a descent down the grand staircase toward the Great Hall, struck by the silence of the castle around him as well as the strangeness of walking through its majesty as a free man once again. It was still grand despite its bloodstained destruction. Sirius could see through the tall arched windows that a brilliant sunrise was now lifting itself across the sky.

His heart grew enormously heavy as his thoughts drifted to Remus and Tonks again. He scurried toward the Great Hall, hoping to find others who would share even an inkling of the emptiness he felt. He recalled Remus's instructions to remain focused on his wife and children, and for a moment Sirius wondered if he should make his way to the Shack instead. But that shrill grating voice resounded once again, and the decision was made for him as he reached the scene of mourning in the Great Hall. None of the grief-stricken and battle-weary crowd paid Sirius any mind, as they all raised a trepidatious gaze toward the front of the castle as they listened.