ᴀᴅ ᴍᴇʟɪᴏʀᴀ ~ ᴅᴘꜱ (ꜱᴛᴇᴠᴇɴ ᴍᴇᴇᴋꜱ)

35- dedicated to the one i love.

Steven,

I wish this were under better circumstances, and I'm woefully sorry for my poor penmanship. I'm currently holed-up in a classroom trying to write this out as fast as I can. I'll explain in a bit.

I'm not sure how long this pencil will last, so I'll just say it: I love you. I love who you are, your mannerisms, your intelligence. I love the person I am around you, and I'm forever grateful for the time we had together.

Had. Past tense. I've gotten myself into a bit of a pickle the past day or two since I saw you. I could rant, but, again, we're on a strict time restraint here. My parents are withdrawing me from Saint Constantine. They made up some scapegoat about grief clouding my brain, but it's all bull. I'm sorry. I don't know why I'm sorry, but I am. I couldn't avoid this, as much as I wanted to.

I'm gonna try to stay in touch as much as I can, but it's not looking good. Do me a favor-- don't tell Amy about that part. I'm going to give her false hope, and I want her to hold onto that. She's a great girl, and I can't stand to be the thing that breaks her. I'd never say it, but I'm forever indebted to her for introducing us. Take care of her, okay?

More than anything else, I want you to know that I don't regret anything. Nothing, not even this, could make me hate you, or any of the dead poets, or regret anything I did. I knew from the moment I saw you, sitting awkwardly in that booth, rambling about radios, that I was getting myself into something I could never undo. I only regret not taking more pictures (or any pictures, I suppose. You'll stay evergreen in my mind, dork. Don't worry about it.)

This isn't goodbye, it's an intermission. Worst case scenario, the universe will throw us together again years down the line. Hopefully, it won't take that long. I'll still pray to all the stars above every night, just in case. I don't expect you to do the same, but it would be nice. Let me revel in my superstitions in peace. I've not got much else to hold on to.

You're destined for great things. I'm honored to have been part of your life, even for a moment, and even more honored to continue that role. I'm forever indebted to you for the unconditional compassion and everlasting impression you left on me. Every time I look in the mirror, I'll see a bit of you, whether it's in the confidence in my posture or the brief notion of a pat on my shoulder.

Thank you, and never change.

Sincerely,

Ivy (Ives) Albrecht

p.s. Tell Pitts hi for me. I feel like I barely got to know him. Also, tell Cameron that I think he's a cunt. I got to know him too well.