Smile (Complete)

We are responsible for those whom we've tamed. Part 1

"Tharn…"

"What, Tharn? On Friday, too, there was "Tharn"!"

It's already Monday, and Tharn is still angry with Type and does not want to see him at the school gates after class. Pretending that he is not here, Tharn passes by, forbidding himself to look back at the boy clinging to the cold iron.

"Tharn… Forgive me…"

Sometimes Tharn hates himself for such moments of his own "spinelessness". Making his expression as stern as possible, Tharn turns around:

"Type. I've already told you everything. Stop following me around. You have classes at home, so go home. There's no point hanging around here."

"Forgive me."

Again the trembling voice and the painful despair in the huge eyes. Fingers grab the gate, as if this adult child is about to fall. Type... why are you like this, Type!..

"Go away."

"Please..." the voice breaks with the first sob.

"Please what? Is there no one else to babysit you?"

Tears flow down the child's cheeks.

"Oh, fuck it. You can stand here, I'm off. Just soon Sun will roll out with the company, and…"

Tharn still pulls himself up, not finishing the thought. He just shrugs it off, starting to walk towards the bus stop and hoping that Type will have the sense not to run after him. Because he wouldn't stand it. He would hug this miserable kid and start comforting him in the middle of a noisy street. After getting off the bus, Tharn stumbles. Shoelaces drag on the asphalt.

Have your shoelace tips quarreled and don't want to hug?..

Damn, Type!..

Tharn does not want this, but in front of his eyes there is that beautiful sunset on the beach and restless kid Type, who naively rushed to "reconcile" his shoelaces, and Tharn threw him so rudely into the sand.

How many times has he pushed him away since then?

But it's your own fault, Type! These untied shoelaces do not want to climb into the loops in any way. I really wanted to help, and you fucked up all my endeavors.

Tharn calms himself, not Type. He needs a weighty excuse for himself why he is not with him. It's no easier in class than at home. Tharn can't focus on the teachers' explanations. But he should: it's his final year and he has plans to study in the US.

It's better. There's no need for this affection... where would his tears go later?

That's just Tharn is not sure that it would be the tears of Type only.

At the last class on Friday, Tharn, who has not achieved concentration, looks out the window. The clouds are gathering. For sure, a downpour will burst in by the evening.

The sky is not frowning at you...

And at whom, Type? Who is it frowning at? They say that time puts everything in its place, restores even what seems to have been destroyed to the foundation. But I'm not up to pretty phrases right now.

All week, Tharn cautiously went out to the school yard, thinking that Type was waiting for him again outside the gate with his "forgive me". And today — it makes no sense to lie to himself - Tharn desperately hopes that he will see him there.

But there is no Type. Type has learned his lesson.

By seven in the evening, the water is rinsing the sky, air and earth. Tharn is reclining on his bed, rereading the same paragraph for the tenth time and not understanding anything.

The doorbell rings.

Type!

Tharn is blown up a little stupidly from the spot and runs to open it, already on the way guessing that there is simply no way for the Type to appear here.

"Naya?.. What are you doing here?"

The girl is standing under an umbrella, from which the rain flows down in streams.

"Can you let me in first?"

"Ah... yes, of course," Tharn nods, stepping aside, "come in."

When Naya is inside, Tharn shifts from one foot to the other, and then says:

"Listen… I know we haven't clarified that situation. But I'm really not up to romance right now, Naya. Just understand, I…"

"Type is missing. It's the second day he's escaped."

Tharn's heart does a somersault, but he pulls himself together with an effort of will:

"Well… I do not know where he can be... let his mother go to the police."

"She did. They can't find him."

"Let them search further, the town is not big… What's that got to do with me?"

"Mhm, Tharn. Nothing to do with it, right?"

"What are you talking about now?"

"Don't you understand?"

"I don't understand."

"Come on, Tharn. The whole school knows that you were hanging out together and after Sun's birthday you fucked him off."

"I didn't. But what am I supposed to do? Should I be an eternal babysitter? I gave him a museum, walks in the evenings... and he ran to Sun anyway, as soon as he beckoned with his finger. I am powerless to change Type… No matter what I do or say… he cannot be changed."

"We are responsible for those whom we've tamed," Tharn. Have you forgotten?"

However, when you let yourself be tamed, then it happens to cry," Tharn involuntarily brings back words from the same book in his memory.

"Naya, I can't help anyway."

"You should know what's going on with his mom."

"I can imagine… But how did you even find out about it?"

"My father is her boss. We're wasting time, Tharn."

"Eh?"

"Get dressed and take an umbrella. Let's go and look for him in your places. Probably sitting somewhere where you were together, shaking there and crying, thinking about you."

"No, Naya. I'm not an emergency service."

"And if I say that last Friday, Type went with Sun because of you."

"Because of me"?"

"Get dressed! I'll tell you on the way. If Type gets sick and dies, will you also stand here like an idol?"

"Eyes are blind. It is only with the heart that one can see rightly."