Smile (Complete)

To be true

"What's up, Tharn? Homesick?"

"What?"

The fourth month of his new life. With old thoughts and pain stuck with the blunt end of a needle in the heart.

A room for two in a student dormitory. Tharn's neighbor, Fred — is a rather sociable guy from the north of the country. However, Tharn doubts that he can make him a good company for the evening.

"Well, homesick. Are you longing for being back home?"

Tharn swallows nervously:

"I don't know… Perhaps."

"Well, dude, it happens. Moreover, you're quite far away from Thailand. Probably also miss him—" Fred nods towards the framed drawing that stands on Kirigun's bedside table, "you miss him, don't you?"

Tharn grins, nodding:

"There is such a thing."

"Did someone draw you together?"

"He… He drew us."

"He? What's his name?"

"Type."

"Well," the guy connects his thumb and index finger in the "Okay" gesture, "you look good together... it's probably hard, right?"

"What exactly?"

"Long-distance relationships."

Tharn's ears are starting to burn:

"Uh, no… I mean, we're just friends. We haven't been dating. Just friends... just friends—" Kirigun begins repeating himself at the end.

Fred grins mysteriously, playing with his eyebrows.

"What?"

"Well, it's okay. It's just the first time I've seen a guy who would keep a common portrait with a friend on his bedside table and stare at it for half an hour almost every night. Here. I'm sorry if my remark is not very appropriate."

"Everything is fine. We're really just friends... close friends."

"Okay, if you say so. But you know, if you want to spend time somehow "in a special way", I can tell you the address of a good bar - purely guys, you'll have fun. If you want, we can go together."

And although Tharn speaks and understands English well, he admits the idea that somehow he heard his neighbor "wrong":

"Mm… I don't not really…"

"Oh, my God, Tharn. Have you never heard of gay clubs? Actually, they let you at twenty-one, but if you decide — I'll arrange — we'll enter without any problems."

At first, Tharn only digests what he has heard, and then, laughing tightly, crosses his arms in front of him:

"No, no, you took me for the wrong person," Kirigun is not sure that he chose the right words, "I... I prefer girls… I wanted to say that I have nothing against gays, but... mmm... I'm not one of those."

Fred shrugs, chuckling:

"Okay. As you like."

Why the fuck did he even think I could be a gay?

"But you know," the guy starts talking again, "a lot of dudes who go there date girls.

"Really? And then why do they go there?"

"Sort of, to suck dicks for fun. Well, or when someone diesy it with them. Some of them really work with their mouths, like a vacuum cleaner. I say it, dude."

"For fun?" Tharn feels like he's about to vomit. Before his eyes now, for some reason, a wild picture from the past, where dirty paws clinged to his defenseless boy.