Closing Time

Chapter 13

(Iris By The Goo Goo Dolls)

Rylee's Pov

Scared: thrown into or being in a state of fear, fright, or panic.

Terrified: to fill with terror or alarm.

Anxiety: a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.

Panic: Sudden uncontrollable fear or anxiety, often causing wildly unthinking behavior.

All of these emotions are how I felt when I went into my room at the bar and saw a letter. A letter telling me that Jason, and my parents were fighting to get custody over Iris. Now I'm sitting in the living room, looking at the letter as Sam and Iris play a video game on the TV.

Nothing prepares a person for this. Nothing does. Nothing prepares you for how you're going to feel or how you're going to act. I've been quiet today. Sam watched Iris again today while I worked the lunch shift at the bar. I wanted to be able to sleep normally tonight, but now I know I'm not going to be able to do that.

Iris was basically hanging out with Sam the entire time I was here, and I appreciated it because I don't know if I would be able to say anything to her. I don't know if I would be able to function, knowing that she could get taken away from me at any moment.

I got up and walked to the bathroom, locking the door and sliding down on the wall across from it. I needed a minute in my own sace. I needed a minute to breathe. I looked down at the letter and wanted to rip it up. Reading it over and over as I sat there, tears falling down my face. They can't take her from me. I won't let them. I need to get an apartment, i need to get a car, i need to get my life-

"Rylee?" I heard Sam's voice on the other side of the door.

I stood up and wiped my face. Washing it in the sink so it looks like I didn't cry that much or at all. I tucked the letter in my jeans and covered it with my shirt. I opened the door and Iris stood there with a smile on her face.

"Momma, sleep." She held her arms up and I picked her up.

I swallowed all of my emotions. I can't let anyone know how I feel. I opened the guest bedroom door and sat her on the bed. I changed her and got her ready before I laid down next to her. She closed her eyes and started to fall asleep. One thing that Iris was extremely good at was sleeping. She always fell asleep easily, she stayed asleep, and she woke up late. She is the perfect child when it comes to sleeping.

Once she was asleep I walked out of the room after changing and stood in the kitchen. The house was quiet, and I was glad about that. I set the letter down on the counter and stared at it, hoping it would disappear.

I leaned against the counter and held my hand over my mouth and I cried. My hand muffled my cries, and I stood there crying for what felt like hours but was only ten minutes. I had enough money saved up that I can put a down payment on an apartment. I can take out a loan for a car, i'll just pick up more shifts-

"Ry?"

I didn't move. I honestly can't, with the spot that I'm in. I'm too emotionally and physically drained. This is so tiring, it's a constant battle. Why can't I just live happily? Sam was speaking, but I couldn't hear him. I could, but I was tuning him out. I was too far into my head.

"Rylee?" He put both hands on my shoulders lightly, and I shook my head.

I looked up at him and he moved his arms off of me. I guess that was the only way to snap me out of the trance i was in. He took a step away from me, not wanting to scare me.

"What's going- what is that?" He started but then noticed the letter on the counter.

He reached for it and I didn't stop him. I felt frozen in place. I felt numb to any emotion right now.

"Rylee if you don't want me to read this then i need you to stop me." He paused, waiting for any sign of discomfort before he opened the letter.

He's grown to love Iris in such a short time, I know that this is going to hurt him. I laid my head on the counter and let another sob wrack my body as he wrapped his arms around me. He turned me around so that I was facing him, and he hugged me. This is the first time that a man is touching me and I'm not scared. I'm not terrified that something is going to happen to me.

"They can't do anything to you. You have a good case against them, you'll still have Iris in the end, Ry. And I'll be by your side every step of the way." He said softly, before I pulled away from him.

"No." I repeated and shook my head.

"What do you mean no?" He questioned with a confused expression.

"I can't stay here. I need to be able to provide for her by myself."

"Rylee you are. All I'm doing is giving you a place to stay."

"You're giving us everything, Sam. I haven't spent a penny since we came here."

"That's the point though. You don't always have to buy things Rylee."

"Why are you doing this?"

"Because I like to help people."

"No. Why are you doing this?" I asked again, calming myself.

"Because I want to treat you how a man is supposed to treat a woman. I want to give you things that you didn't get. I want to be that person that you lean on whenever you need help. I not only want to be there for you, but I also want to be there for your daughter, Rylee."

I shook my head and bit back the tears. Running from good things because you're scared is something that I would call a coward move, but here I am about to do it.

"No, Sam. I can't let you do that." I whispered out, scared that any voice above what I was talking in was going to get me yelled at.

"I don't care how much you push me away, I'll always be there for you, whether you like it or not. It's my choice to stay. Push me away all you want Rylee, i'm not going anywhere especially in this situation. At this point in time. At this moment."

"Momma?" Iris looked up at me with tears in her eyes and I closed my eyes and dropped my head.

"Hey, let's get you back to bed. Your mom needs a minute." Sam lifted up Iris and walked her back to the room before I could protest.

I sat there with a dumbfounded expression on my face. This man was willing to give up everything for me and my daughter to be happy? I heard him humming and saying the words from Iris by the goo goo dolls. I felt my heart beat throughout my body, and I felt myself wondering if maybe I'm being too scared. Maybe I'm being too closed off. Maybe I'm pushing the good people away.

Maybe I need to start opening up to people. And maybe I should start with him.

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