Shrek is love, Shrek is life
a Shrek x Gender Neutral Reader
Disclaimer: I do not own Shrek but the plot is mine
also I stopped eating for this so I better get 1 million views
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Y/n a heir to the throne. Fiona was cast out because she was a bitch, so Y/n was next in line. They weren't related, Y/n just appeared out of the sky and was like "I'm next in line, bitch" only being two days old. The King and Queen thought it was amazing how a baby could fall from the sky. They loved Y/n so much they threw Fiona in the garbage. They even arranged Y/n to get married to Lord Farquaad, the most handsome man in the world
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Look at that jaw line
Yet, Y/n didn't love this hot man. They were on YouTube and, they saw this fucking green ogre. They fell in love at first sight. Y/n went to their parents
"I want to marry this fine motherfucker" Y/n said showing their parents their computer. Their parents stood shocked
"What the fuck?" The King asked
"We got you a fucking fine ass man and you choose an ogre?" The Queen asked. The King and Queen denied Y/n's request to marry the hot ogre. So, Y/n ran away. They ran to a swamp, a familiar swamp. They recognized this place from their future hubby's YouTube videos. Then a door opened and outcame their future husband
"Who the fuck are you? Get out of me swamp" Shrek said
"I love you" Y/n said as they bit their lip. Shrek bit his lip
"I love you, too" Shrek said. Y/n felt her heart jump out of her chest, but then out came a pregnant Barney
"Oh, hi honey. Who's this?" Barney asked
"Who's that?" Y/n asked confused. Shrek picked up Barney and threw him into outer space
"I don't love Barney- I love you" Shrek said. Y/n was so in love at the moment
"Let's go make babies" Y/n said
"Bet" Shrek said
I closed the book and looked down at my children
"And the rest is history" I said. My children stared at me horrified
"What the fuck?" One asked
"Shrek is love, Shrek is life" I said with a smile
