Life's Weird, but We Make It Work (Bob Belcher x Reader/ Reader Insert)

Episode 10: Lobsterfest

"Ocean Avenue is gearing up for this year's Lobsterfest, and that mean old tropical storm we've been watching is moving out to sea. Which means, perfect weekend weather!"

Bob groans at the tv "Ugh, d*mn it!" "So if you think you hear thunder, it's just my stomach growling. Hahaha, I love lobster." The weatherman laughs. I laugh a little too, I love stupid jokes. "This guy's unbelievable. Stop pimping for Lobsterfest!" Bob shouts at the screen "And start primping for Lobsterfest." Gene says, messing with his eyebrows "Looking primpy." Louise says.

"No! No primping for anything!" Bob shouts "Bobby, come on. Why are you so grumpy?" I ask, I squish his cheeks together. "You know why," Bob says, looking out the window "It's no fun being a burger man in a seafood town. I hate lobsters and their stupid fest. Plus I'm allergic!" Bob rants "Yeah...I know. I thought you were gonna die on our first date." I tell him.

"Oh my gosh! Your face is really red. Are you ok?" I ask nervously as Bob scratches his neck. He only responds was a garbled mess of noises before face-planting into his plate of lobster "Oh crap! Um, can someone call 911?!" I shout. I stand up to leave, but Bob grabs my hand and lets out more garbled words "Don't worry, I'll be right back-HEY YOU! Let me borrow your phone! My future husband is dying!" I shout, running towards the guy at the table across from us.

"Seriously, why did you say yes to going to a seafood restaurant when you were that allergic?" I ask, leaning on the counter "You made me nervous, so I went with whatever." Bob states "But why? I would've-" "Y/N, I'm not having this talk again. It's in the past and we ended up married anyway-hey, what are you guys looking at over there?" Bob asks. "Um, nothing. Just pictures of people....doing it." Louise states, whispering the last bit.

I roll my eyes as Bob relaxes his shoulder a little

"Oh. Hey-wait a minute, that's not p*rn."
"Yeah, that's a good thing!"

Bob takes the brochure away from the kids "You brought a Lobsterfest brochure into this house?" Bob asks angrily. "Can we please go this year?" Tina asks "Absolutely not." Bob says, ripping the brochure in half. Louise groans "Ugh! But there's so much fun stuff happening," She says, pulling out ANOTHER brochure "Unveiling if the world's largest butter vat, for instance." Tina pulls out her own brochure-at this point, it's an internal battle to not laugh. I swear if Gene pulls one out, I'm gonna lose it.

"The coronation of the Lobster Queen and her court of lovely lobster maidens." Tina says reading her brochure. I let out a wheezing laugh (earning an upset look from Bob) when Gene pulls a brochure from his shirt "Entertainment by John Van Horton and the Music Extrusion." He says. "Hm...I do love those guys," Bob says, glancing at me "As a matter of fact, Gene, you were conceived to a J.V.H song." "And I plan return the favor." Gene hums before the bell rings.

Bob groans, "Oh great-I mean, hi, Hugo." He sighs, Ron and I wave at each other. "You know, I couldn't help but notice, yours is the only window in the street without a Lobsterfest poster on it." Hugo states "Yeah." Bob says, placing his hands on his hips. "Why might that be?" Hugo asks. "Well, because Lobsterfest is stupid!" Bob says "What?" Ron gasps sadly "I'll handle this, Ron." Hugo says, patting Ron's arm.

"Put the sign up, it's the law." Hugo says firmly "It's the law?" Bob asks "Martial law," Hugo states before showing off his sash "I'm Grand Marshal of the fest this year!" "Ooh, Congrats! Such a fancy sash. You look like Sissy Spacek in Carrie!" I say. Hugo smiles nervously and rubs the sash "Oh, thank you!" He says, Bob steps in front of me and looks down at Hugo "But, Hugo, as a health inspector, you must know how disgusting lobsters are, right? They're bottom-feeders that ear garbage all day." Bob states.

"Huh. They like garbage? Then they just eat here! In your face, Bob!" Hugo laughs. He presses the Lobsterfest poster into the window "And now in your window! Come on, Ron. Let's make like a lobster and get the shell out of here." Hugo jokes, Ron tapes the poster down "Alright." He says. The two were barely out the door before Bob ripped the poster down.