this is us | jjk

sixteen ~ so maybe you're not okay

a/n:
hello, hello! can you believe we're almost done with this series? it's been a crazy journey for these two, hasn't it? lol. well, i'll just say the angst is strong in this chapter but! this is the last angsty chapter, which i'm kind of happy for myself, my readers, and the characters lmaooooo. i hope y'all enjoy it and now it's only going up from this point out!

❤️

playlist:

like crazy - jimin
alone - jimin
amygdala - agust d
snooze - agust d

~ six months since the breakup ~

Six months have passed since you and Jungkook split up. Sometimes, your heart ached continually, and you wondered when it would stop or ever cease. You almost gave in and called to check how he was doing or what he was up to, but you didn't. It was foolish to believe he'd want to talk to you since he, too, was hurt. You had shattered his heart for the second time, and you shouldn't be surprised if he never wanted to hear from you again.

Your heart skipped a beat anytime his name was uttered, whether it was Jin or Yuna. A part of you wanted to know if he was doing well or if he was as unhappy as you, but you were hoping for the former. He deserved happiness, and you wanted him to find it even if you weren't a part of it.

❤️

As much as you wanted to run away from responsibilities, you couldn't. Your show was the only thing that kept you going-for now, at least. Critics and audiences alike praised the first half of the season, but as the season proceeded, numbers began to fall, making you doubt your talent and career. Could your writing be suffering as a result of your breakup? It did take up a lot of your mental space these days.

You wanted to hide under a rock and never come out again, it was virtually impossible because your phone rang nonstop day and night, attempting to put out fires-executives, producers, and writers breathing down your neck, never letting you take a breath. You just wanted everything to halt, and you just wanted no one to need you. But you were reminded of that whenever you stepped into your apartment. You didn't know which was worse anymore.

❤️

The show's last day couldn't have come any faster, and Kenji wanted to go big and celebrate the filming wrapping. You arrived at the beautiful modern building, which hardly looked like a restaurant.

"Hello, darling."

You turned to your ex-boyfriend, his arm snaking around your waist. He could never help himself, but you smacked his arm away. "Kenji," you said with a scowl.

"I'm sorry, love-habit." You rolled your eyes. "Come on, let's celebrate," he said, holding his arm for you to take, though you didn't amuse him by doing so. You were tired of his antics.

Because it was a party and you were practically the face of the project, you had to put on your best smile and pretend everything was fine-better than okay, perfect because you had gotten what you wanted out of your career, you had worked your ass off to get where you are. Still, none of this mattered if you didn't have the most important person by your side, but you didn't dare utter his name.

If there was one thing you hated about being in this industry, it was the mingling aspect. Of course, you cared for your crew but showed it differently than how Kenji wanted to. You preferred intimate gatherings, taking a few groups to talk and catch up.

Though, at this point, you didn't want to be around anyone anymore and just wanted to eliminate the noise clouding up your mind and space.

"Hey, babe. Are you doing okay?" Hyunie asked, pulling you in for a hug.