" i know our duty but i just cant....."
Shinganshina c.845
On that day.... we were reminded humanity was no more than livestock.... for THEM
Found outside the walls at a young age with no memories of your past at all all, that stuck with you was t...
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Soldiers Chapter Nine
"damn" jean swears
"Mikasa, Armin... the idiots." conny yells
"JEAN, [], You lead the rest to HQ I'm going after Armin" he continues
"Were coming with yo-" jean starts
"Don't be stupid, there are still titans everywhere you two have gotta help the others only you two can" he begs
Was I really that good? Did people really think I could lead? I didn't even make the top 10 how could I ever lead anything. However conny was right if I didn't do this nobody will and everyone else needs leaders right now with that in mind I put to bed the destructive thoughts entering my head and focused on the task at hand
"I don't like it any more than you do but he's got a point these guys will crash and burn without us," I say to jean with a pleading look in my eye
"fine, don't die on us man," he says
"right back at ya, see you back at HQ" conny laughs as he flies away
As we push forward into the titan onslaught an unease settles on me and I just pray Mikasa or Armin hasn't died. I hack down titan after titan clearing a path however some slip my grasp in my worry-filled trance which I'm finally snapped out of by the cadets behind us yelling
"It is no use were not getting anywhere NEAR headquarters, not unless we all mind dying" Jean mutters
!GORE WARNING NOW!
As I land on a rooftop Jean and I observe the scene below. A scene that would haunt me for years to come. My nose was filled with the stench of blood, a smell that made me want to throw up as it hit my nose. All I could hear were the dying screams of those I had failed. See the entrails splattered on the floor and on the mouths of our tormentors like cannibals enjoying a leisurely meal or like I was watching a meat factory at work. These people I was supposed to lead and protect with my own life if it came to it but my distraction just killed entire squads, destroyed lives, traumatized the cadets and worse these people had families, mothers, and fathers that were waiting for them behind wall rose, I didn't. Who was I to survive and them not? Due to my failure, their dead entire families have been destroyed, and all because I couldn't get over my silly feelings. I cant lead why did I ever think I could Dismembered corpses and Mangled corpses fill my eyesight burning themselves into my long-term memory like a piece of wood art, my dreams forever haunted by the screams of those I couldn't save. I hear people scream for friends and colleagues as they desperately try to get out of the white pearly teeth of the nightmarish humanoids. The sheer amount of arms legs heads and ODM gear collect at my feet placing me on top of a pile of bodies. These lives ended prematurely and it's all my fault.
!!GORE WARNING ENDED!!
"Why couldn't we stop them, why couldn't we?" This is a nightmare, how can we lead these guys I'm not meant to lead I'm the last person that should've been given the reigns" Jean mutters what has been running through my head
