Flames to Embers

16-Cameron Mason

There's a section of flashbacks in this chapter. This might be a little confusing, but I wrote it the way I did because Katniss is imagining things. She's unconsciously altered her memories, even though she still knows what actually happened. This is a real thing.

Shout-out to @1-800-ANGST  you're awesome!!!!!

There was a loud knock on my door that night just after dinner. I swung the door open, expecting to see Effie or Finnick, but instead found Johanna.

"Katniss," she said, upon seeing my confused face. "I wanted to talk."

I stared at her for a second, debating whether or not I should take her seriously. I didn't want her getting in my head and toying with my emotions again. No thank you. But I was interested in actually speaking to her.

I sighed. "Have you been on the roof yet? I asked her. "It's really nice up there. You can see the whole city. It's a bit windy, though. Makes it hard to hear."

Her eyes lit up, and she led the way to the elevator.

We were silent on the way up, since we both knew the cameras would pick up whatever we had to say. I doubted Johanna came to me to conspire against the Hunger Games, but we would probably be talking about something personal, and maybe even talk some smack about the Capitol.

As soon as the doors cracked open, Johanna was out of the elevator and into the fresh air. I smiled sadly at her reaction. "It's funny how you're training to survive out in nature for several days, at least, but-"

"But they haven't let us outside since the parade?" She interrupted. "Yeah. Kind of weird."

That afternoon had been the last day of mandatory training, so it had been seventy-two hours since the parade. "For someone who's spent her entire life hanging out in a giant forest, it's been a rough few days, being cooped up inside."

"I bet," I said, relating to that all too well. I leaned over the railing, staring disdainfully down at the colorfully dressed people below. "What was it you wanted to talk about?"

Johanna stood next to me, and was silent for almost a whole two minutes, which would have been a new record for her, before she finally spoke up. "Cami."

Oh. I should have known. I opened my mouth to say something, but Johanna had already started to talk again. "You only knew her for a week or so, but you were the last person she saw before she died. That's not- I don't- That's not fair. I was her twin. I was her best friend, and you're here... taking all that credit, as if you knew the first thing about her."

"I don't pretend to, Johanna. You're right, I didn't know her that well." I protested.

"Than don't pretend to," she snapped. "It's not fair that you're here and she's not. She could have won. And I should really hate you for that, but I don't."

"You... don't?"

"No," she snorted. "No, I wish I could, but I can't. You did what you had to do and Cameron was content with you winning. If it couldn't be her, she wanted it to be you."

"Oh," I said, not quite sure how to react to that. Flashes of my first Hunger Games came back to me. Savannah and Cameron. Caleb the sociopath. Victoria who came so close to killing me. Lana, lying in a coma at the bottom of the tree, covered in large stings, over her entire body...

I hadn't allowed myself to actively think about my first games in years. They had been so much worse than my second games, and I was so young. Whenever I thought about them, I would quickly shut those thoughts down and focus on something else. It was part of the reason I had gotten into singing and songwriting. It kept my thoughts at bay.