Heart of the Sunset (Heart Series #4)

T W E N T Y - F I V E

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Life Goes On

Of course, even after seeing the pregnancy test’s result, I still tried it with Ino. I know I’m keeping my hopes up but I just really want to have a baby, not just to pleasure Ino but to have a child on my own.

But then another month passed by, until it turns to a year, nothing still happened. Hindi pa rin ako nabuntis. Ilang beses na akong sumubok. Paulit-ulit akong bumili ng PT at paulit-ulit rin ang ibinibigay nitong resulta sa akin—negative.

Halos buwan-buwan dinudurog ang puso ko. Sino ba namang hindi? Kung ang kaisa-isahang pangarap mo, hindi mo matupad-tupad.

Year had passed and finally I had the guts to go to an OB-GYN and have my check-up. Nakakatakot. Nakakakaba. Pero ito lang ang natatanging paraan para malaman ko kung bakit hindi ako nabubuntis.

“Sa’n ang punta mo?” tanong sa akin ni Arabelle. She’s with me the whole depressing moment of my life. Pero wala siyang alam kung ano ang totoong problema ko.

“Uhm… may bibilhin lang ako sa mall. Ikaw na muna ang bahala rito kung hindi ka pa babalik sa shop mo, ah,” wika ko.

She nodded. “Alright. No worries. Anong gagawin mo sa mall? Isn’t it too early to go the mall?”

“Mas okay ang mas maaga. Marami kasi akong bibilhin.”

Magsinungaling ka pa, Nivia. Lie better.

“Okay. Ikaw bahala. I’ll just wait for you here. Basta ba we’ll have our lunch later, ha?”

I nodded. “Yeah, sure. Aalis na ako, ha? Bye.”

“Alright. Take care,” aniya saka kumaway sa akin.

I immediately went to the parking garage and went inside my car. I started the engine and drove my way towards the nearest OB-GYN’s clinic.

I know that it’s unfair for Arabelle whenever I keep secrets from her, pero hindi ko rin kasi alam kung ba’t hindi ko masabi-sabi sa kanya ang tungkol dito. Kahit sa kakambal ko, kay Nikki, hindi ko rin masabi-sabi. I just want to keep this to myself and move-on by myself.

Nang makarating sa harapan mismo ng clinic ng OB-GYN ay napasinghap ako. I came here ready. Whatever the result for the check-up, I’ll gladly accept it.

Kumatok ako. Bumukas agad ang pinto at iniluwa ang mid-40’s na babae. She’s probably the gynecologist.

“Bonjour.”

Ngumiti siya. Inayos niya ang suot na eyeglasses. Napatingin ako sa Doctor’s robe niya kung nasaan ang name plate niya.

Marcelina Francisca.

“Oui. Bonjour. How may I help you? Ultrasound?” tanong niya. “Oh, come on in.”

Ngumiti ako. Pumasok ako sa clinic niya gaya ng sabi niya.

“Uhm… I just want to have a check-up. I also want to ask some questions to you,” wika ko. Kabado ako. Pero kailangan kong tiisin ang kaba.

“Oui. Have a seat. What’s your name?”

“Nivia Irene Soletelle.”

“Miss Nivia Irene Soletelle. Or is it ‘Mrs.’?” tanong niya.

Umiling-iling ako. “No. Just ‘Miss’.”