Chemically Imbalanced

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"The party was nice..."

Bree just sat next to me on her bed, twiddling with her thumbs, not a word in response from her.

"Bree?"

"Huh" her little voice finally spoke up. And the twiddling stopped.

"Oh yeah... nice..."

"Bree I would've given anything for something like that... but you just shake it off?"

She huffs and falls back onto the bed.

"You don't get it Lucas. They're not having a big celebration because it's my first since remission... They're doing all of this because it might be my last birthday."

I carefully watch her expressionless face, afraid to miss anything.

"Why am I telling you this. I don't even really know you that well. I mean we just met and thats only because I didn't want to see your ass in jail."

That same smile finds it way back onto my features.

"You don't want me to go to jail?"

She opens her eyes and squints in my direction.

"Lucas. I know your on drugs, but seriously, whats wrong with your hearing."

"No, I heard you... just why?"

"Because...."

"Because you like me?"

"No." She playfully hits me on the shoulder. "Because, I don't know you and I think I would really regret not ever knowing you."

"So... get to know me then. You allready helped me run from the cops, which by the way i'm pretty sure is illegal, so you might as well tell me about youself."

She lets out a laugh and the room lights up.

"Okey, okey! But you first."

I contemplate about that offer, but that would only be fair.

I mimic her actions from earlier and huff as I fall back on the bed squishing her half way in the process.

"So! Let me tell you all about Lucas Miller-"

"Lucas! Get off you're squishing me!"

Her giggles fill the air and I can feel a different sort of high kick in.

"Mmmh lets see. I used to be an MMA fighter until the last blood test we took...
My best friend is Caleb...
My life back at my house is pretty shitty...
And your couch is worth more than my whole house."

"Get off!"

Her tiny fist smacks me ontop op my head.

"Ouch!"

I roll over onto my stomach and she takes a deep breath.

"Now that I can breathe again...
I was diagnosed last year and went for some treatments. After a long fight I went into remission. I havent been feeling to well so my father insists on blood tests again, hence the big day.
I hate when people treat me differently after they find out.
I don't have a best friend.
And its probably true about the couch... that thing costs a fortune. And all because some dead dude made it as his last piece before kicking the bucket!"

I erupt into laughter. Somehow she is both the most positive and negative person I know.
She can except me just the way I am but she has a problem with a couch.

I look over at her and she gently turns her head to me.

"What If you can fight again?"

She balls het hands into fists as she scrunches her nose.
Maybe she was trying to imitate me... But our fights definitely arent that cute.
I have literally heard my bones break inside of me, the excruciating pain that follows makes you wish your opponent would do you a favour and knock your lights out for good.

"Not gonna happen, Bree."

"Uuuughhhh."

She shoots up and scares the live out of me. She might be small and potentially sick but she moves fast. She'd probably be a huge threat in fighting with her fast movements.

"Seriously? Why?"

She jumps up from the bed and paces around the room impatiently.
Frustration making its way into her soft features.

"Bree..."

I prop myself onto my elbows.
I hold my breath and stare at her, trying to gather my thoughts.

"No! You don't get it okay! I had to beg my parents to let me go to college, I have to tell people to treat me normal, to not make cancer my entire existence. And here you are. You have this normal life. You're not sick, you were a pro athlete, you go to class everyday! And here you are. Screwing it all up for some high, lasting like what, 30 min? Wake up! Or else you'll lose everything.
You'll become sick, you won't graduate and I'll be damned if you die from stupid decisions."

By now her back was turned to me and her voice started to break. I couldn't say anything. She was right.

"I just met you. And I planned on knowing you for the rest of my life. However long that might be! So get your head out of your ass Lucas!"

She finally turns to face me again and her face is stained with tears. Her cheecks glowing red.

My existence means so much to her... and somehow she fails to se the worth in her own.

Before I could relize what I was doing I made my way to her and wrapped her in my arms.

Her body falls limp and I easily support her weight, holding her up as I keep her safely in my arms.

"Im so scared..."

She lets out a small wisper making it almost impossible to hear, but she has all my attention now.

"I know."

"No, Lukey. You don't know. Not being able to eat. Having a tube stuck down your throat. Having needles driven into your spine while being awake. Begging the nurse for more pain medication. Staring out of the window at all the happy people while not even being able to support your own head to keep it up.
Hearing your mother cry beside you ehen she thinks you're dying. You don't know anything."

Her bofy shakes in my arms her breaths fighting thier way to her lungs.
It hurts so much seeing her like this. It infuriates me. I feel like I could tear the world apart with my bare hands atthis moment.

"Bree. I know I don't understand, okay?
I relize that I haven't got the faintest clue of what you've been through. But I promise I'll be here for you and for whatever comes next."

Her shaking stops and her head lifts from my chest and I let her go.
She grabs my hand and her teary eyes look up to find mine allready on her.

"Then you have to ptomise me you'll get clean. If im gonna fight so are you."

I bite my lip in hesetation. I've tried quiting before and it was hell. Night sweats fever. Absolute hell. But I can't say no to her and I can't hurt her either.

"Okay."

A faint smile appears as her eyes light up. "Yeah? You promise?"

I wrap my arms around her once more "yeah okay. I promise."

What the hell have I fone to myself.