We were always kissing

2 days until

"Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer" -Ed Cunning

This morning was shit... I'll tell you that, well not really crying kind of shit, but the truth kind of shit... I woke up and like always checked my phone- now we all know that when I start saying that it means shit's gonna happen- so as I was saying I checked my phone and saw a text from Ali, It went something like:

A: "Hazel listen- I've been avoiding from telling you something and I'm feeling really guilty and bad about it, text me.."

Now I was shocked a bit, not from the fact that she's feeling guilty or bad- that's is Ali, keeping to herself and then becomes physically ill, but about the fact that she kept something from me, we don't keep secrets- not secrets that can make you feel bad for not saying.

H: "what's up? I just woke up sorry I didn't answer"

A: "well I can't really sugar-coat it"
A: "I knew about Taylor and Thomas before you told us"

No she didn't...

H: "knew like... the day that happened before I told you or knew for a while and just kept that to yourself?"

A: "I saw them and confronted Taylor and that's why she stopped talking to us all- well that's why I think she stopped... and since then I wanted to tell you but she told me this was a one time thing and a mistake, and I know that's not an excuse but I couldn't be the one to break your heart and I didn't think much of it... sorry"

H: "I- well I get what you mean but I do wish you would have told me, when did you see them?"

A: "um... probably three weeks or so before you caught them, I only saw them kissing and I talked to Taylor and she said that was a mistake and that's it's nothing"

H: "lying bitch I can't-"

A: "I just want to come clean, please believe me that it wasn't my intention to hurt you"

H: "hun I'm not angry with you, I'm just surprised it went for that long, like what the fuck I think they 'dated' when we celebrated 2 years together"

A: "I saw them couple days after I think so maybe..."

H: "oh god I hate him! Why's this shit isn't over?! I fucking moved to another country and this shit keep hunting me!!"

Like actually what the fuck I hate it! I can't stand the fact that I don't have a quiet moment without hearing about him or thinking about him!!!

A: "well you can try to put it behind you maybe... maybe you can talk with him and get it over with.."

H: "I'm not going to talk with him! If he have something to say he can call! I'm done"

A: "you blocked him darling, he kinda can't" Bitch?! Why stating the obvious?!

H: "well I'll think about it... I'll talk to you later- love you"
A: "love you too, sorry!"

Talk with him... like he deserves it! Ha! He deserves a slap! My best friend saw them and even after that he didn't though about telling me... I'm sick of it! Why everyone assume he deserve that I'll talk to him?!

*******

Later this day, I talked with mum and dad, told them about what Ali said, and not so very surprisingly they agreed with her, they said I should talk with him and put him behind before I go to school "so it won't affect me"

I asked them why'd they think I should talk to him and asked the obvious question that's been on my mind -does he even deserves that opportunity- and they said "you deserve that- you deserve to put him behind you" bullshit... that's going to hurt- that's self destruction that's what it is! But I got to- I think...

H: "can we talk?" I wasn't really asking- we are going to talk

To delete or not delete- that is why the question" Shakespeare.

To late, this bitch-boy answer fast.

T: "omg yes, please! Let me explain please"

H: "uh no! I don't need or want your explanation, I need the truth, when, why, how far (although I've seen how far you and your dick went) and stuff like that- the truth basically"

T: "ok... um that started a week or so before our 2 years,I don't know the actual date, but basically we just passed each other and started talking and then we kissed and you can figure the rest, I don't really know why, maybe not her own reason but I was just stupid and horny, I know that's horrible but I don't want to lie to you anymore, there wasn't a deeper reason, sorry"

obviously his dick went deep enough- ugh the image won't disappear from my head! But really?! A sorry- yeah that help

H: "stupid and horny! Wow I can't believe it! Well you maybe won't believe this but I'm laughing so hard right now! I should be crying but I can't stop laughing! That's so stupid " Pathetic

H: "I can't believe horny is your reason! I knew it was stupid dating you and not sleeping with you, it was a matter of time before you'll cheat huh? 'I'll wait' my ass 'you worth the wait' my ass- you just went and fucked that whore" Boys are stupid, I'm stupid.

T: "don't call her that, you were friends before everything" is he for real!?

T: "and please don't! You don't do that now, you said you don't want excuses so don't blame yourself..."

H: "don't tell me what to do! I'll blame myself how much I want! Even if it's not my fault"

T: "are you drunk?"

A: "are you stupid? Yes but I'm not I'm just annoyed"

T: "is this going anywhere?" The audacity of this boy!

H: "are you two dating men-whore?" I'm literally afraid of the answer but I'm feeling bold

T: "we didn't, then we did, and now we don't" I need explanation
Is it just me or is he giving me bitchy attitude?!

H: "huh?"

T: "when you found out and before- we didn't, but we still talked even after, she and her boyfriend broke up too so- I helped her through it, then a week or so later we dated, and my mum did not like her- that's an understatement - so it became difficult and we broke up the day after you left"

I found someone more pathetic than me! HA
and god why did his mum lied when she told me that they weren't dating?!- maybe because she didn't want to hurt me but still- when did it became the national excuse to actually hurting me?!)

A: "well I hate you both so you have my blessing to date I guess, if you want"
"say hey to your mum, I miss her, don't call me again I won't call you either. that was a good closer״ imagine him actually telling his mum I said hey. That can be funny!

And that might sound cruel but after that I blocked him again right away before he could answer. I swear I didn't drink but god I'm drunk on excitement! And I didn't even cry the whole time!! Good riddance- this chapter is over!

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