; 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐞 | l.s.

v.

v.

❝it's narcissistic, but fuck it, i'm calling.❞

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note; 2k+ words of pure pain and stress. you're welcome!!!!

p.s. don't get used to updates two days in a row...you just got lucky this time ;)

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Louis' movements the next day are languid and robotic. His legs move him from lecture to lecture. His hand copies the pages his professors project on the board. His friend drags him to the dining hall. His jaw chews, his stomach digests. His lungs fill and deflate. He thinks his nose tickles and sneezes at one point, but he can't be sure. His body is doing it all. There's no thought, no emotion, no brain behind any of his actions. Have you ever tried running as fast as you can through a pool of deep, sticky molasses? Okay, neither has Louis, but he's pretty damn positive this is what it'd feel like.

He walks back to Devonshire Hall, passing Lyddon Hall as he goes. His eyes are glued to the window he knows is Harry's dorm. The lights are off and the curtains are closed. He wills his gaze away from the building and back to the uneven pavement of the sidewalk. There's cigarette butts tossed carelessly along the edge along with some various wrappers and old receipts. He wonders how many of the fags are his. Too many. Harry hated the smell. It's the first time his mind has thought anything at all today. He wishes his only thought wasn't about Harry.

Speaking of the boy, after scanning his student ID at the entrance and auto-piloting his way to his door, he's met with an upset looking Niall hurling millions of questions and expletives at him.

"What the fuck did you do to Harry?" It's the only one that sticks out to Louis.

He wordlessly puts his key in the doorknob and opens the door. Niall pushes Louis in, stronger than Louis'd have liked, and shuts the door behind them.

"What did you do to him, Louis?" Niall repeats. Louis isn't used to seeing Niall so stern. He's honestly kind of intimidated.

"I didn't do anything, Niall," Louis defends. It's the first time he's spoken today and even he is shocked by how monotonous his voice comes out.

It's true, though. Sure, he was a little forward about how he's probably still madly in love with his ex-boyfriend. He didn't really think it was a secret, to be fair. He made sure it was extremely clear when they parted that it was never about him not loving Harry. Never.

Niall doesn't appear satisfied with that answer. He shakes his head disparagingly. "I'm fucking serious, Louis. I'm worried sick about him and I'm not going to let this go."

Louis is starting to feel the same worry. Harry seemed uneasy last night, he won't deny that. But he's not sure Harry's behavior seemed to warrant being worried sick. Did something else happen? Something bigger? "I don't- I don't know, Niall. Honestly."

He sees Niall's expression soften the slightest bit as he pulls out Louis' desk chair and sits. He runs his hand down his face nervously.

"What happened, Ni?" Louis finally asks.

Niall exhales shakily. "I don't know, man. I just- I saw him leaving his room this morning and he looked a mess. Figured he just slept  in by accident, but something wasn't right. I stopped 'im in the hall, and he just... He wouldn't look at me, ya know? And, like, he just looked terrified. I asked him what was wrong, of course, but he just said he needed to go."

Louis chews on his lip anxiously. "Did he- Was he in class?"

"No," is Niall's response. The response Louis didn't want to hear.