Saving Bucky (Bucky Barnes x Reader)

Chapter 45 - Gambles

An eerie chill starts in your fingertips. Like a glove, it slowly spreads into your hands and through your wrists, winding up your arms.

"The Hold?" you echo in a low, harsh whisper. James remains rooted in place, only the smallest twitch in his jaw giving away any sign of agitation or unease. "You want to go back...to the Hold?" you hiss, gaze narrowing as you slowly rise from the couch, your head tilted in morbid fascination with his request. "Why in the fuck would you think we should go back there?"

"You tell me, Interrogator," James says, eyes darkening in unspoken challenge.

Your lips part in sudden realization, and a sick grin tugs at your lips. "How long?" you ask. "How long have you wanted to go back?"

James' brow twitches. "The night of the party," he grunts.

"Why?" you ask.

James doesn't speak, but he doesn't need to. You can see the answer in the furrow of his brow and the downturned corner of his mouth. The night of the party was the first time you had been intimate. And you can tell by his silence he had decided to go back the moment he had been forced to push that pill past your lips. You chuckle coldly. "So that's why you wanted me like this," you say, gesturing to your temple. The one now pleasantly numb, the static from earlier silenced. "You knew I'd say no to returning to that place without even a thought otherwise."

"You might not like the idea, but it's a logical next step," James says quietly, but firmly. "The pills came from the Hold. There might be more there."

Your cheek twitches in irritation. Irritation because he's right on multiple counts. If he had proposed going back to the hold before you had slipped back into your cold objectivity, you would have said no. End of story. But now...well, now you realize he may have a point. The pills came from the lab at the Hold.

Regardless, it's not good enough. The pills aren't worth losing the biofile.

"And if there aren't more there?" you question. "You'd be wasting time and putting the rest of our mission at risk. It's not worth it."

"Not worth it?" James parrots back in disbelief. "This is your life."

"My life isn't worth a damn if that biofile makes it into the hands of the Tressis," you shoot back.

"Have you forgotten we're chasing a rumor?" James growls. "We don't even know if the file exists," James argues in a gruff, angry tone. "You'd trade your life on a maybe?"

You fall silent. Still. "Gabe was certain," you finally say.

"Gabe is dead," James grunts. "And you'll be next without your medication."

Your jaw tightens and you bite the inside of your cheek. The kindling of un-sparked rage festers in the pit of your stomach, one ember away from bursting into flames despite the numbing layer that soothes you into a cold nonchalance.

"That's right," you say sharply. "Gabe is dead. And I might hate the memory of him for putting me on these stupid pills to begin with. But he was brilliant, Barnes."

James opens his mouth to argue, but you hold up a hand and continue talking.

"He was brilliant, and rarely wrong," you hiss. "If he was right about the biofile, Asmodai is trying to raise his own army of supersoldiers."

"Y/n-"

"If we lose the biofile because we're chasing these pills," you interrupt. "We'll be doing nothing but delaying the inevitable. And we'll both be dead. Because if Asmodai succeeds there won't be a force on this Earth that can stop him. Not even your broken Avengers," you seethe.