HEATHERS (the musical oneshots)

Murderesses

cw for murder, mentions of self harm and suicide, i think that's all but let me know if i need to put anymore warnings 👍

Heather's lips are painted blood red, and she is dressed to kill - - like always.

Pressed tightly against Heather's curves are one red, tight turtleneck, and a particularly mini mini-skirt. Her hair is curled and half of it is tied up into a ponytail with her blood red scrunchie.

Duke has a black and green plaid mini-skirt on. Since I've met the Heather's, my closet has became strictly mini-skirts.

A black leather jacket accompanies Duke's green tank top. She's wearing distressed fishnets and combat boots.

McNamara is dressed in a tight black skirt and a pale yellow shirt with mid-arm sleeves, she has socks and flats.

I am wearing just my undershirt, partly unbuttoned, and my usual skirt.

We are bloodthirsty teenage girls who lust for our deserved revenge.

~

Jason Dean has invited us over tonight. I don't know why, because he despises the Heathers, but our plan - - one we've had for three
weeks - - is being put into action.

As Duke drives, we all giggle the same snarky giggle, listening to the music on the radio. We've brought overnight bags, though we leave them in the car. Jason's father is out of town.

I knock on the door hard when we arrive. He opens it a few seconds later and kisses me, I wipe my mouth right in front of his face.

We make it upstairs to his room and he offers everyone but me a cigarette. He insists I share his with him. I take it to the bathroom and flush it down the toilet.

When it's time for step one, HC nods at me. Here I am, sitting on Jason's lap.

"Baby- Ronnie," I don't let him finish his sentence, I press my black lipsticked mouth to his and his eyes are closed. Not mine, I'm watching as Heather Duke slinks out the door with the pills in her hand. I hear the fridge open and close, a can of beer open, and Heather slinks back through the door.

I haven't stopped kissing JD, not until Heather slips into the door and drops her jacket on the ground and closes the door shut. I pull away and stand up, and he's got lipstick all over his mouth now, and I go over to Duke and take the beer and give it to JD.

He instinctively chugs it and then lights another cigarette, and I'm standing by the Heathers and we're all giggling our popular girl giggles.

And he just like, looks at us, but still drinks it and smokes his stupid cigarette and Heather Chandler groans because, Veronica, it smells like plastic on fire when boys smoke.

And we all giggle again, and then miraculously, JD finishes his beer. He burps, loudly, and we all groan this time.

"Fuck, Jason, that's disgusting!" I spit, and he laughs, and smokes his cigarette.

And then, thank the lord, he is getting drowsy and I think it's a mix of the beer and the pills. We all smile, this is working.

Sooner or later, we're on the couch watching TV, and Jason finally passed out. We all jump up and run to our bags.

Gloves, a big ass knife.

I quickly kiss JD.

We help each other put like, three layers of gloves on each, and Chandler stabs him first. Right in his abdomen. She passes the knife cautiously to Duke, and she goes batshit. Stabs him four times, then passes it to MacNamara. She cuts his thighs in a pattern like as if he were self harming, and hands me the knife.

I slit his fucking throat.

We did our research, before this. We were careful not to stab his lungs or heart, we want this to be believable.

I get his notebook paper after changing my gloves. We have put our gloves in a trash bag, the Heathers are all showering. I take a pen and his notebook, and carefully forge his handwriting.

Dear friends, family, and anybody who gives a fuck;

I have made this disturbing choice of fucking offing myself because Jesus fucking Christ, my life is a hellhole. My mother fucking exploded, my father is an asshole, a drunk. Not only does he destroy buildings, he has destroyed ME. I do drugs and smoke and drink and cut and spend my free time at the 7/11 and fuck my girlfriend because it's the only way I can actually feel something, but that still doesn't work. I've tried to kill three people, that shit all failed thanks to my girlfriend, I've tried to blow up the school, that failed too. So now, when my only resort is the substance abuse and the slushees and my girlfriend, I find out that my girlfriend, the only one who loves me, is FUCKING the Heathers. Then the drugs stop working and the alcohol stops making me feel things but I still drink and smoke because I'm fucking addicted, right? But I'm so DONE with LIVING, so here I am, bloody and cut up, and here I am, fucking DEAD.
So if anyone out there even cares, hope you're happy with my choice. Fuck you, world.

- A Sincere Fuck You From Jason Fucking Dean.

I drop the knife near his limp body and throw my gloves in the trash bag, then join the girls in the shower.

This isn't a normal 'girlfriends having a shower together' shower, this is a 'we just killed Veronica's boyfriend, let's all make out' shower.

We are truly fucked up women, truly beautifully fucked up.

We are all relishing in each other's naked bodies, admiring the cuts on each other's thighs, our stretch marks, the way our tits perk up. We laugh with each other and then we all get touchy and then-

Oh, what a beautiful, erotic, wet, and messy painting us four are.

We are drunk, horny nineteen year old girls who have just murdered someone, and it is beautiful how some people in this world can murder and fuck a few minutes later.

We get out of the shower and don't bother to fully redress, simply throw on our bras and panties and tuck our clothes into our bags. We slink out of the door and before we know it, we're out in the freezing cold of the summer night in nothing but practically lingerie.

Duke is the first to speak. "My place? Skinny dipping sounds fun right now."

And so we go to Heather Duke's big ass house and skinny dip and then paint another erotic painting.

Sometimes murder is fun.