Their Darkness

Caring

It's been four days since I started college again, the first day when I got down from the car everyone was in shock seeing. By then everyone had already known about my wedding to Ahan after all it was a pretty big deal.

Ahan kept his promise though he did not once step into my room he also had his things shifted to his room. I just need someone to talk to and the first person that came to my mind was my mom, yes we are not the most bonded mother-daughter duo but she is the one who I can talk to right now so I decided to call her. My mom picked up the phone after two rings.

-" Hello?"

-" Hey mom, what are you doing?"

-" Just finishing up my chores, now stop beating around the bush and tell me what's the matter?'

-"it's nothing...I just wanted to talk to you"

-"oh yeah, listen Cynthia I am your mom and you are not one to call for sappy conversations so spill."

-" um... it's just that I and Ahan might or might not have had a little fight and well we aren't really are on talking terms so I just wanted to talk to you"

-"look, relationships are tied together by a delicate thread sewn in a beautiful pattern. Each flick of the thread signifies the depth of the relationship and when it snaps the whole pattern looks dreadful. And when one of the threads is sewn out of the pattern the whole pattern doesn't take long to fall apart so it's better to sew it right back in until time allows not everybody is as lucky. But do not hurry and prickle yourself take your time" she explained her voice softer than usual. The motherly warmth wrapped around me like a warm hug giving me comfort.

I spoke some more casual words and then hung up after a tiny thank you.

I decided to set up my things in the room I haven't had much time to do so anyway. I picked up my suitcase stacking my old clothes beside the new ones already arranged in my closet.

So you have already decided to accept this?

A voice in my mind asked. Have I? Maybe yes. I can't ask much from life anyways maybe I should be grateful for all I have. It's not like I had wished for love or even hoped I would get it in my life. I had always wondered if love really would feel like a cup of warm cocoa on a winter night or a firm shoulder on a bad day.

I hadn't realized I was setting up my books in the drawer when my fingers brushed against the familiar leather bound. I set it aside as I continued filling in my books arranging them to the side. As I finished up setting my things away I sat down on the bed tucking my legs under me. I puffed out a breath as my eyes wandered around the room lading on the book kept beside me.

I oped up to the first page tracing my words of ink on paper. As I read through the words a small smile tugged at my lips.

So while we are still here,
While we still look at one another in the eye, I find I have no recollection of the girl who fell in love with the boy before her.
Yet my heart seems to have a better memory. It longs for untameable laughter, soft gazes, and gentle fingers grazing cheekbones. But I am sure that's just a lost girl longing for home in the arms of a stranger.

I had just finished a book about two enemies who fell in love and then became strangers again but this time with memories. The lines just stuck to me and I had penned it down on the paper. It's kind of my hobby to join beautiful words by a string creating artistry called sentences, it just pulls down the chaos around me to a lower notch.

I have filled many pages in the diary writing to my heart's content sometimes with tears in my eyes and sometimes with a barely contained grin on my face or sometimes with just a blank expression. Though it's all in the past I haven't written anything after my last goodbye to my diary.