Oblivious ironicism

2

Brian POV

Brian was rudely awoken by his alarm clock beeping and buzzing. "my fucking god" the tired boy mumbled, as he turned off his alarm clock and rolled onto the floor. The impact woke him up enough to go downstairs, and make some sort of something to eat. As he looked through his cupboards and fridge, he decided on an energy drink-based cereal. after having his meal, he decided to get his keys and head off to the strange new school.

On the drive there, he thought about this new school, monster high. He was expelled from his old school, because of all the class he skipped, assignments he missed, and to top it all off, he ate the smoke detector while on fire as a dare. He was one lucky bastard, though. Because he was expelled on the last day of the first semester, he got credit for those classes. He just hoped that it would be as chill as Oz and Vicky had made it out to be.

As he pulled into the lot, the light through all the windows was blotted out. Everyone was watching him. Judging his every move. He was stuck in this hellish void forever. there was no escape. Then, the void contracted into the shape of a familiar Oz! him and Vicky were laughing their asses off at Brian's calm, to terrified, to pissed expression.  "yeah, yeah. veeeeery funny" as they both calmed down, Oz explained that Polly dared Vicky to get Oz to do this, and that who was he to turn them down? "Polly?" The zombie asked.

"OH MY GOD!" Vicky blurted out "haven't met anyone yet!!! I gotta introduce you to Polly, and Damien, and Scott, and Liam, and-"

"Ok, ok, I think he gets it." Oz interjects "now we gotta show him his classes!"

As the friends walked into the school together, a ghost with a flamethrower jumped in front of Brian, and began torching the boy. After about 15 seconds of fire, Polly stopped.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!?" she yelled, dumbfounded as to why he was just chilling.

"hey, can you not? being on fire is annoying as hell," said an increasingly pissed Brian. "I'll trip all the fucking smoke alarms and probably kill a couple of people"

"HOOOLY SHIIIIIIT HES FIREPROOOOF" yelled a certain demon. "you wanna be friends? burning down buildings is gonna be so much easier if you can do it from the inside!"

Suddenly, Brian is doused in fire extinguisher foam. as he clears it away from his eyes, he sees Liam, extremely pissed and holding a fire extinguisher.

"for your information, this is an ironic display of how the people at the bottom of society almost never get what they want"

Brian, already tired of everyone's shit, asks the now visibly uncomfortable Oz (which is no small feat, as he's an eldritch horror with almost no facial features) if he wants to show him to his classes.

Oz happily complies, briskly walking away from all the social interaction and catching Brian up on the people and places in Spooky Academy. He showed Brian the classrooms, the auditorium, the library, the weird tree outside, the bathrooms, and the gym.

He also told Brian about the people who went. Who to talk to, who to avoid, who to shove in a locker/beat the shit out of on sight (Leonard) etc.

Oz also told him that if he's ever not gonna skip class, that today should be that day, so he can see where all his classes are. As the first period bell rang, Oz and Brian went their separate ways. Brian looked at his schedule. "first period, AP jump scares. not horrible." he muttered.

--------------------------A/N--------------------------

609 words

omg first real chapter!!! it feels so weird that im actually publishing a story lmao

yours truly,

author-chan