⟡I'm Sorry ♠⟡♠ Ashtray⟡

Who Did It?

      I woke up sore the next day, trying to get myself out of bed as painlessly as possible. I groaned slightly, trying to find something to wear under my crop top I had picked out, to try and hide some of the bruises. Now it's not like I was exactly trying to hide them, I don't give a shit and normally I'm used to people not giving a fuck when they do see them. But still, I didn't like putting them on display. So today I put on a fishnet shirt, covering my midriff as well as my arms. I pulled on white Nike crop top, throwing on some random pair of the many cargo pants I had. This one being a black pair, lined on either sides with pockets. As well, of course, my boots. Pant legs overlaying the top of my boots.

   I looked down at my phone as I walked into school, happy to have a full battery. I got to charge my phone, got a eat something small, not much sleep though. Of course, my father was there waiting for me, pissed beyond belief I had been gone for so long. Well gone in general. If it were up to him he'd have me locked up in some dungeon, never to see day light again. Obviously he had been drinking heavily when I got there, my brother watching the whole time. It was almost moments like this where I feel like he almost feels bad, watching me struggle to breath on the floor as our father stomps and kicks me. Blood spilling from my mouth or nose, from my cuts. But just then as any tiny flicker of guilt or regret, is gone, replaced with content. As if I deserved it. Like I had just practically begged for the beating.

"What the fuck happened to you?" I looked up from my phone, seeing Maddy and the others all in their usual spot, as if waiting for me. I smiled seeing them, dropping the smile as I thought about the question she had asked. I quickly spun of my left leg, attempting to spin around and go in the other direction. I had covered what I could on my face, but the cuts weren't something I could fully hide. I felt arms over my shoulders as the group suddenly dragged me to the bathroom just across from us. The one we go to so often. Maddy stood in front of me, holding my chin as she inspected my face.

"Who the fuck did this? Was it your brother?!" I shook my head, looking around at the others as they all inspected the wounds on me. One of them lifted the back of my shirt, causing them all the gasp.

"What the fuck Leslie." It sounded hurt, like it was me that had beat them. Somehow I kept my calm, not really effected by their reaction.

"It wasn't him." I shrugged, trying to get out of their prying eyes, fixing my shirt. They slapped my hands away, lifting my shirt completely now, just under the breast. I rolled my eyes at their comments and remarks, pushing my shirt down.

"Really, it's- It's not that bad. It-" Maddy swatted my nose harshly, almost glaring at me.

"The fuck it isn't bitch. Now who the fuck did this?"

"It was.. It was my dad. Can we be done with this now please?" The bell rang, causing me to try and escape the bunch.

"Leslie babe, you can't keep living like that."

"Maybe you should like, report him or something."

"And what? Go to foster care or some shit? No, thanks. Soon enough I'll be out of that fucking place for good." I had no clue how the fuck I'd be able to leave my father, that house, or even this town. I guess that's why I stopped at the bridge that night, I thought that could be my escape. Even after I turn eighteen, how am I gonna move out with no money? It's not like he'll let me get a job. I sighed, ignoring the thoughts.

"This isn't healthy though." I side hugged Maddy, the other's saying we'll talk about this later. Maddy gave me a hug as we stopped outside the classroom, the teacher waiting impatiently for us to hurry up so he could close the door and proceed with todays lesson.