6 - ᴀɴᴅ ɪ ᴡᴀꜱ ʙᴇɢɪɴɴɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ʟᴏꜱᴇ ᴍʏ ɢʀɪᴘ

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Lily never minded waking up alone. Really, she didn't. Sure, it was better when Rose was there, but it really didn't matter. Rose tried to be there when she fell asleep, but it wasn't uncommon for her to leave in the middle of the night. It was unfair to think she would stay all the time. She couldn't sleep and there were only so many nights she could spend reading. There were only a handful of times she's woken up in the girl's arms.

Even still, she still missed the vampire's presence.

Lily was rudely awoken by a loud pounding on her door.

"Stop..." She muttered speaking barely above a whisper.

Of course, her voice was as clear as day to anyone else in the house that bothered to listen.

"Get up, Lily. We have so much to do."

Oh, it was Alice. Why would Alice wake her up?

Then it hit her like a freight train. It was graduation day. They were graduating today. Her entire class had to walk across the stage, grab their diploma, and embrace the next chapter of their lives.

Yeah, It would have really been nice to have Rose there today.

She grabbed a pillow and threw it over her face. She missed the feeling of simply being confused at being woken up. It was getting hard to breathe and it had nothing to do with the weight resting on her face. She didn't want to do this. Not today. Her breaths were shaky. She could tell. She willed herself not to crave. She could force it all down until she didn't feel anything at all. She could do this. She had this.

"Fine. Alice, just come in before you break the door." Growing up, Alice was one of the few Cullens that spent a lot of time with her. Alice and Lily used to be thick as thieves, but that time came to a close. As Lily found herself, their relationship strained. It wasn't anyone's fault, but it took some adjustment. They both had to relearn how to relate to each other. Lily was really glad Alice had Bella now and for eternity she figured.

Alice wasted no time entering the room, a familiar spring in her step. "About time. I've been bugging mother dearest for hours. It's already almost ten and we haven't even started."

Lily uncovered her face and sat up ready to face whatever Alice had in store. What she wasn't expecting was Jasper following behind his wife. He shot her a knowing and reassuring smile. Lily hated not being able to hide her feelings completely, but there was nothing she could do about it. She gave him a tight-lipped smile back that turned out to be more of a grimace.

"Honestly, Lily. It wouldn't hurt to pick up your floor every once in a while."

Lily shrugged looking around the room. She liked that her room was a little chaotic. It was clean, just slightly cluttered. Her room always used to be spotless. She didn't know how to explain how the mess brought her a sense of comfort that she felt at Scott's place. It was proof of life. There were entire stories to be told in the mess of clothes on the floor, in the extra blankets littered over the bed, and in the scattering of old books that Lily had never once touched. Lily had to turn away from Jasper's all too knowing look.

"Alice, please, we don't have to be there until one. I think we have time."

"Nonsense. There's so much to do. Everyone is mostly finished downstairs, but you take forever to get ready."

"I do not! Also, why are we having a party here again?"

"Not you too! Nothing is going to happen. Well, you take longer than anyone else in this house. Go shower. It's gonna be a long day."

"I literally showered last night, but I'll do it again if it gets you to leave." It was clear that Lily wasn't being serious.

"Rude! I'll remember that. Then, let's get started on your hair. What are you feeling about beach waves?"

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