𝙎𝙀𝙑𝙀𝙉 | walker scobell

IV.

( SEVEN )
"he's not coming back? ever?"
⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

(TW!! this chap contains violence and some family problems that might be triggering)

THE NEXT DAY i woke up just in time, and i woke up beside mckenna's stuffed duck, and it freaked me out for a second, i went to the bathroom to take a shower, unfortunately mckenna preferred cold water in the morning, so you know happened. i dried my self up and went to put on a plain black dress that i borrowed from her and a cardigan to make it more appropriate afterwards walked downstairs to see mckenna's dad cooking pancakes, it smelled pancakey, i mean, you get it right? yeah you get it. mckenna's family had always been a second home for me, just like mo's family was a second home for shay.

"mooorning" mckenna smiled cheekily with a glass of coffee, and a glass of matcha that i hoped would be for me, her dad proceeded to do some flips to the pancakes.

"hey jul" mckenna's dad called out to me "your mom is calling" he held one hand on the phone and one other hand on the pancake he was cooking, he handed me the phone and i held it while i could hear my moms breath hitch.

"mom?" i asked her, while she was still controlling her breathing on the phone, she finally took a long deep breath and started talking "jul? juli?" she asked stuttering, i was scared of what she was going to say and i answered her calling my name "yeah ma im here, im here" i repeated two times hoping she could hear me clearly.

"your father" she took a deep breath "left" 
"w-what? mom this isn't funny, what are you talking about?" 
"he told me to read you his letter" she continues
"no mom, what do you mean?"
"just take a deep breath and listen to me" she starts to calm me down through the phone "he left a letter, and he told me to read it to you"
"mom what do you mean?" i start to think about the worst scenarios
"to my daughters," she started to read something "mom?" i started asking but she ignored it and continued reading the letter she said was from my father, before he left us today. "i am sorry that i didn't become what you needed me to" she continued, "i don't ask for any forgiveness, i just wanted you to have a happy life, a normal life. i always know that at the end of the day, i wasn't going to make it, i wasn't cut out for this grown up things, i was still in my your immature mindset, i don't deserve to be with you. i think its best if i give myself up, so i don't endanger any of you anymore, i hope you remember me, i don't mind if you remember me for the bad things that I've done in my life, just don't forget me. to my daughters, my heaven and my partner in crime, my wonderful annabeth, i love you, and i really liked that we were a family, i wish you all the best, i hope they don't bother you anymore. to my daughters and my partner, see you soon"

she hung up the phone as she finished reading the letter that my father wrote, i was in shock, so maybe this is how my mother felt when the debt collectors came to our house an attacked her, this is how it felt to feel lonely and hopeless and no other spark of hope in your heart, this is how it felt to be betrayed by someone you once loved.

let me give you a quick recap about what was all this about for some reason we don't know, our parents don't quite get along that much, and our mom advised if we wanted to stay at any of our friends house, its a better place rather than home, because at home something would happen, and it wouldn't end as well. my mom always worked at her office and make fake errands to run late home so she wouldn't face my father.

none of them were abusive, no it wasn't about that, both of them was very caring and affectionate people, but when they got married and i was born, the year after shay was, unfortunately my father's business had slowly run out of customers. he wasnt washing any cars and his employees was not being paid, so he asked for money from his friends, and he just so kept it a secret from my mother.

things were fine, until my mom found out when the debt collector came into our home, and my father wasn't there, and the debt collector just kept yelling at her threatening her and smashing all the things in our house. when my father came back, my mom was in the kitchen breathing unsteadily, and the things in our house was broken every single glass was shattered on the ground, tears of my mother could be seen on the glass, as if she was in a midst of a shadow not seeing anything, even if we were standing in front of her, she just sat there, staring blankly to the ground, and my parents relationship was never the same after that.

my father finally confessed that he was the cause of all the debt collector coming at us, coming at my mother. he was the reason everything was shattered to the ground, he was the reason that mom was never the same, and he was the reason that mom didn't trust him anymore. my father was a coward, so he hid indoors all the time. while when my mother was in the office working she would be threatened by debt collectors and embarrassed in front of every co-worker there, this happened when i was 8, i realised my 12 nobody was there for her, nobody could help her, everybody was late to help her.

- - -

i walked in circles in mckenna's living room with teary eyes, wondering how could i tell shay about this, so i called her, i wanted to be honest, but it would shatter her heart into a million pieces that i cant fix. i hoped that she didn't answer the call, but she did, and i tried to start off with some simple greetings but the words just stuck in my mouth and my tongue wasn't moving as if i was frozen for a second

"jul?? why are you calling??" shay asked in a sweet voice, i couldn't do it, but i had to she deserves to know, "dad" i managed to let out a word, and it was the only word that was in my mind after the news my mom told me.

"what about dad?" shay asked once again, i controlled my breathing and started talking about everything mom had explained to me before, shay didn't believe it at first, but one more sentence after another she started to realise that it wasn't a lie, it was dad's choice to give himself up to those people, her breath hitched and then her voice trembled in shock of the news "so you mean" she started to talk with her unsteady breathing "he's not coming back? ever?" i didn't reply to the question she asked and stayed silent, she took a deep breath.

"i thought i'd be happier if he was gone" she whimpered "but I'm not happy at all" she started crying and she hung up the phone, i couldn't believe that this morning could be the worst morning in my entire life.

i then asked permission from mckenna's family to go out until the evening and they approved, i walked to a lake i always went to, it was close to a field of sunflowers, and i sat there, a person came up from the back and, i saw my friend, my freakishly short friend, walker. i wondered why he was here, but i didn't ask any questions, he sat next to me, and we talked until evening, i didn't tell him, of course i didn't, but i was enjoying his company.

grace speaks !

this is a filler deppressing sad backstory chapter, so if you wanted to ignore this chapter its completely fine! because its not really that important in the story line. i just wanted to put in some backstory and all that. quick reminder that people do face this all the time so i tried to make at a realistic as possible, and as respectful as possible.

i hope u enjoyed this, please vote and follow it helps ALOT

stay safe, stay healthy ladies and gentlemen and my non-binary beauties