Wishful Thinking ~Puzzleshipping~

Chapter 18 ~ Yami

Yami's P.O.V.

Going into this, I should've known something would go wrong. I mean, I hadn't imagined anything like this, but I felt I should've. I knew that Yugi could've possibly died if the plan failed, and honestly, even though he in his right mind couldn't say, I'd think Yugi would have preferred that rather than all of this pain. He always started off as normal, and sometimes he even left that way, but every time I came to visit he didn't remember the day before. Every day she tortured him.

I ran my hands through my hair. It was the second time that he had to be sedated yesterday. It was the second time, and it was all my fault. I knew I'd regret trying to bring her up again. She couldn't possibly last too much longer, but how could I know? For as long as she's been alive, a little while could last 80 years, and Yugi would probably be gone before that with the stress she put on his body.

I looked over at the time and stood up. I had to visit him every day, or else he might think I had abandoned him. I wished I hadn't left him alone that morning. One of the days I visited, he didn't remember anything, and then I brought up Cassie. It all came back to him at once. He had a violent breakdown, screaming about how I abandoned him, how I still loved Cassie, and how he was convinced that I never really loved him. I wondered if he really felt that way or if she was just taking advantage of his mental state.

I walked over to the dresser and put on the school uniform. I wanted to make it seem as though I still had it together. Yugi was distressed enough on his own without having to worry about me. I stopped watching all the news, after just a week I already knew the body pile would only continue going up. On the news they say they're suicides, just happening in a central area, but at this point there must be so many they've probably come up with a thousand different cover-ups.

I walked over to grab my phone when suddenly it rang.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Hey...are you coming to school today?" It was Anzu.

I looked out the window and then at the door, "...I have to visit him. I'll come after."

"Yami..." Anzu said hesitantly, "You've got to stop beating yourself up over this. Sometimes things just happen, there was nothing you could do."

I remembered when I relayed the news to Yugi's friends. At first of course they wouldn't believe me, I didn't want to believe it myself. They all went to visit eventually, and after two or three visits, seeing as he forgot seeing them before, they were too heartbroken to go back. They didn't understand how I didn't have an emotional breakdown visiting every day. Anzu just knew differently. One night, I called and spilled everything to her.

"I could've-"

"No, Yami." She interrupted me, "And it doesn't matter what you could've done. It's done, Yami. You've done all you can. Yugi would want you to be happy. I'm not saying you shouldn't visit him, but do it because you love him, not out of pity for yourself. Don't use it to beat yourself up, and you probably shouldn't go every day - you need a break, and that's ok. He'll still be there tomorrow and the next day."

I sighed, "Ok...I'll come to school after the visit, ok?"

"Okay." She said.

I ended the call and walked out of the door and hurried to the bus stop to catch a ride to the mental facility. The secretary greeted me and at this point I could let myself into the visiting room. Yugi came in a few moments later.

"Hey cutie," I greeted.

"Hi." He sounded tired, small, more than usual.

I wrapped my arms around him, "How are you doing?"