I just learnt some shocking onformation about my brother
He has lived and breathed on this shithole of a planet for 15 long, boring years and hasnt watched a SINGLE barbie movie
I'm appalled
I'm disgusted
I'm ashamed
I'm astounded
I'm rattled
I'm disconcerted
And most importantly,
I'm batman
While writing this my other brother, (hes 10 or something idk he's irrelevant) came into my room, threw a banana at my face, bit my arm, stole my headphones and left
Remind me to never have kids
If i dare ponder harbouring one of those scoundrels please throw a ladder at me or something so i can reassess and get my head straight.
Look at my bite mark (wrist reveal😍😍)
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How beautiful
Also ignore my really pale fucking hand
Lets hope i donr get any of these disease now because a rat decided my arm would be a tasty snack
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I still cant believe my brother hasnt watched any of the barbie movies
Im forcing him to watch princess and the pauper with me, it IS the best one argue with the wall
Omg wait
I
Just
Remembered
About
My
Lemon
So like a few years ago at school we did some kinda experiment with lemons idfk what it was but i named my lemon Aunt Betsie and she was literally amazing
BUT when i got home i was holding Aunt Betsie and my dog, Timmy, bit a chunk out of her mf head 😭
I was distraught
But she could be saved
I performed emergency surgery on her, with like a needle and a string. I stitched her back to life, i thought she was saved.
But alas she rotted away and i could salvage her no longer
So like a normal functioning human being i buried her in the garden
Shes still there somewhere in a little cardboard box 😜
Anyway gotta go force the uncultred molerat to watch barbie with me xx
