On My Mind - S. Aizawa

Chapter Twenty

I Like It!

Y/n's Pov:

I was walking to my office this morning with one thing on my mind.

Shota can't cook for shit.

This morning he tried to make me eggs and bacon but it ended up being burnt and hard like charcoal.

I told him to get out of my kitchen and never set foot in a kitchen again for as long as he shall live.

He said I was over exaggerating. I told him to buy me a new pan.

My thoughts were interrupted when I saw someone sitting by my office. I sighed.

"Shinsou what are you doing here?" He stood up and looked at me. "You said we could talk."

I went to unlock my door. "Yes I did but I didn't think it would be at seven in the morning."

I went inside my office and he followed. "Well I'm here now so can we talk?"

I sat down and sighed. Better sooner than later I guess. I motioned for him to sit down and he did.

"So?" I asked. "Why did you leave?" That's part of the big bingo question.

"There was an incident involving me, the school, and someone else. Things went wrong and I was practically sent away."

He took a moment to speak. "You went to this school?" I nodded. "Not for that long though."

He nodded and I continued. "Your parents-" He interrupted me. "Ours." I sighed.

"They didn't really care for me. I'm not sure why but they just didn't." It's getting harder to say words.

"So when the incident happened they had no problem sending me somewhere else."

"Where did they send you?" He asked. "To the apartment, I live in now. When I first started living there, they paid for it but when I turned eighteen they stopped."

"And you left with no fight." He looked at me sadly. "Hito- Shinsou. I was thirteen when you were born. You were two years old when I left."

I paused. "You had no idea who I was. Mother wouldn't let me near you and father just, I don't know."

He sat there, thinking. "How did you find out about me anyway?" I asked. "I found a box in the attic with your name on it."

I'm surprised my parents didn't get rid of everything that had to do with me.

"But still, my last name isn't Shinsou anymore there's no way you could have-" He interrupted me.

"When I met you, you looked at me like I was a ghost. You had this sadness in your eyes too."

He smiled a bit. "Plus when I came here the first time you called me Hitoshi."

I knew that would come back to bite the shit out of me.

I laughed a bit. "I guess I didn't do a good job keeping it together." He nodded. "Yeah, you did a shit job."

I smiled at him and then looked at the time. "First period is about to start." He seemed saddened but nodded.

He was about to stand up when I stopped him. "Do they treat you good?"

I have to know. He looked at me, the floor, then back at me. "I think you know the answer to that."

He smiled and got up. "Hitoshi wait I-" He shook his head. "Don't worry, we'll talk more later."

He headed to the door, opened it, then left. I put my arms on my desk and held my head.

He knows about me now. Not all of me but still. I want to protect him for as long as I can.

I know he'll probably understand but I can't push myself to talk about it.

But I will, soon.

•

I think I'm in love with my bed.

It's safe here and cozy. Shota isn't here he had late work to do but he'll be here later.

I'm at my apartment because it's the weekend and everyone is allowed to go home.

"I should move you shouldn't I." I looked at the cabinet. "I don't even know why I still have you."

Nothing. "You're the reason for everything." I sat up. "If I hadn't spoken to you I wouldn't be here."

Nothing. "This is your fault." Nothing! I grabbed the glass by my bed and threw it at the cabinet.

When it smashed I just sat there looking at the broken pieces. "Sorry." I went and picked them up.

I went and threw them away. I washed my hands just in case some small shards got in my hands.

That's when the door opened. "Hey." Shota smiled at me as he closed the door.

He came over and kissed me. "Sorry, I'm late." I shook my head. "No it's fine I was just about to make dinner."

He nodded. "You need help?" I laughed. "Yeah, no. You're not allowed in the kitchen."

He rolled his eyes. "My God. It wasn't that bad." I lifted a brow. "I had to throw away the pan because the burnt was stuck on it."

He waved it off. "You just need better soap to get it off." I hmmed. "Well since you're an expert you can wash dishes tonight."

He sighed. "Fine." He pulled me closed and I smiled. I kissed him and he kissed back.

When we separated I asked. "How was your day?" He sighed. "The students are training for their provisional licenses."

I hmmed. "Sounds tiring." He nodded. "How about you?" I want to tell him everything.

But things are good right now. I don't want to ruin things. I will tell him I just need time.

"It was good. Shinsou stopped by." He looked at me confused. "Does it have to do with him wanting to talk to you yesterday?"

I nodded. "Yeah." He nodded. I cleared my throat. "Go get washed up and maybe I'll let you help."

He smiled a bit. "Okay." He went to the bathroom and I got the stuff to cook dinner.

Things are so good right now. I'm happy, it's been a while since I've felt this happy.

I like it.

*******
1050 Words

How was it?

I think I'm gonna end this book at 30

I gotta stop listening to sad songs I'm getting really sad... But it makes me want to write sad stuff >:)