COLLIDING

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i take too many pictures of her. of us. 

she hates it. because she always finds me in her face with a phone. 

i don't feel left out. 

i grew up alone. the only thing that kept my sanity up was maybe sasha and mikasa. but she drives me insane. 

everyday. 

my dear baby. my dear, baby. 

baby.  

she asks me, "do you want to go together?" 

"do you want to eat together?

"do you want to take a walk?"

"do you want to watch a movie?"

we've been married for three years. and not a day goes by where she doesn't make me think how thankful i am for her. 

before i close my eyes at night, her wrapped around me, i thank a god if there is one, for her. of how she is next to me. 

i wait for her every time. it's funny. five years of being together in one house. and yet i haven't consumed enough of her. 

i want an eternity with her. how am i supposed to love her with just one lifetime? 

if i could give her the moon, i would.

when she had our child, she said "i would have never had this little one if it wasn't for you. you make me look forward to all the things i could do in the world."

i never apologized to you for fainting when you gave birth. i'm sorry i wasn't conscious when you bought her into this world.

i'm sorry for crying when she was given into my arms. "you're fine, it's all okay, see, i'm not in pain." you said, crying just like me. 

we both cried together, not caring about the crowd that looked at us weird. 

i'm sorry for saying we should let her sleep in the crib instead of the bed so that we could sleep together. 

it's only because i wanted to be there for you on those vulnerable nights. our dear baby, 

everybody says she looks like me, but only i'm aware of the beauty mark she gained from you,  the shape of your ear lobe on her, and the corner of her eyes are just like yours. 

her skin is soft like yours and how she looks at the pretty sky and smiles is just like you. 

she shares the same face shape as me, and i think she'll look a lot like me when she grows up. they say the oldest looks like their dad. 

i'm sorry for getting jealous of our own daughter, i also apologize for yelling 'those tits belong to me bitch,' when we were with our friends and she grabbed you. 

i can't wait to grow old with you. hold your hands when we are with our friends. 

i want to drink your favorite champagne on a friday night, and eat your favorite pasta dish. 

i want to dance in the rain with you. i want to call you beautiful every time you are near me. i want to kiss you on the cheek and taste your tears every time you cry.

never a day goes by where i'm not excited to see you. 

i will always bring you back home. 

to me. 

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eren got hemorrhoids btw. 

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the last chapter is a surprise since it's barely related to the story (connie is involved). 

- final thoughts, for the thots.

     - this story came out of a detailed dream. 

     - most of my dreams are zoro and armin and sometimes just me helping out erwin with pleasing myself because he only has one (ykwim) :((

(no babes, i was on the floor with my fingers in my coochie while erwin was watching because he got only hand :(( who dreams this type of shit?????????? but it was very hot)

     - (tw: yesterday i dreamt i killed this robber by breaking his knees with a hammer, and he  threw some shit at my face (yes shit) so i went into a rage and killed his family(i don't know how to stand up for myself btw also i'm a people pleaser)

(if my dreams were made into a movie those weird people who call themselves movie critics would like it. not normal people though.)

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