Without You

8.

If Meredith had learn anything over the past few months is that she didn't hate having a family. Not at least the family that they had created. Growing up, her family had never really been around, she was left alone to basically bring herself up so family had never been her strong point.

But after meeting Derek he changed her outlook on everything. More importantly he has ensured that she would never be alone again, finally giving Meredith the mother and sisters she had longed and dreamed for.

"Mer, you coming?" Amelia asked as she zipped up her coat and walked into the kitchen.

"Amelia you don't have to come with me." Meredith smiled softly as she placed her mug in the sink. "Carina just said I need to take long walks if I want this baby to come."

"Exactly, I'm not going to leave you alone because you could go into labour." Amelia walked over and placed her hands on Meredith's bump. "Plus, auntie Amy is very excited to meet you, yes I am."

Meredith smiled as she listened to Amelia talk softly to her bump. They hadn't had the best relationship when they first met but now Amelia was her safe place. Her person to go to if she needed to get anything off of her shoulders.

"That's what I've been meaning to ask you..." Meredith watched as Amelia looked up at her before standing up straight. "Can you be in the room with me? When I'm in labour..."

"Mer..." Amelia said with tears in her eyes as she looked lovingly towards her.

"You've done so much for me and Derek can't be there so I want the person he was closest to, to be there." Meredith was shocked when Amelia opened her arms and immediately wrapped her tightly in her arms, squeezing her as tight as possible. "Is that a yes?" Meredith giggled.

"Of course it's a yes." Amelia pulled back with a huge smile beaming on her face. "Thank you."

Meredith simply smiled and nodded her head before they headed for the front door. She was obviously a lot slower than Amelia, her body completely over taken by this pregnancy now. But she wouldn't change a thing. Not a single thing.

All the back ache, swollen ankles and sleepless nights would all be worth it.

They slowly walked down the path, with Meredith stopping occasionally to stretch her back and run her hands over her stomach. She grimaced slightly when she felt a sharp pain wrap around her body.

"Mer, what is it? Is it the baby?" Amelia was immediately at her side, her arms wrapped around her as she ran her hand up and down his back.

"I'm fine." Meredith hesitated slightly but put the best smile on her face as she straightened her body back up. "I'm fine."

"Maybe we should head home. Phone ma." Amelia said with a slight frown on her face, not believing what Meredith was saying.

"Maybe you're right." Meredith smiled as she still had an uncomfortable ache consuming her body. "But there's no need to phone mom. I will just take a bath and probably go to sleep, plus you've got work."

"I don't want to leave you alone." Amelia said as she followed closely beside Meredith. "I mean you're less than a week away from your due date..."

"I promise the minute I am in labour, I will phone you. But for now, I just need to sit." Meredith smiled at Amelia but knew she didn't believe her. If anything Meredith was starting to not believe herself and maybe this really was it.

"Ok." Amelia sighed. "But I'm not leaving you inti I am certain that everything is alright."

Meredith nodded as she stepped into the house and headed for the stairs. She waited for Amelia to disappear before stopping on the stairs, her hands immediately going to her bump.

"Hey you." She whispered. "I know you're ready to come and meet everyone but just not today. Not today please, mommy is really scared right now and I just need you stay in there for a few more days." She smiled when she felt her son kick back, almost in response to what she was saying.

Her whole pregnancy, she had kept a brave face on but deep down, she was terrified. Terrified of the thought of giving birth without Derek there, she wasn't even sure if she would be able to do it.

Pushing herself up the stairs, she immediately went and climbed into the bath, allowing the warm water and lavender scented bubble bath to soak and relax her body.

Her eyes immediately shot open when she felt her body tense up and her belly tightened. She wasn't stupid. She knew exactly what this was and she knew that her son was coming.

"No, no, no." She cried. "Amelia!" She shouted out but was met by silence meaning Amelia had already left. "Amelia!" She cried out again, just in the hopes that maybe she was still here.

"Ok." She gasped before slowly pushing herself out of the bath and moving to wrap a robe around her body. "We've got this, we just need to..."

She suddenly stopped and leaned against the wall when she felt her another contraction consume her body. But this time the pain didn't stop making her whole body ache in pain. She felt a liquid run down her legs, so she reached down and froze in fear when she pulled her hand back up and saw blood.

Blood.

Her whole body started to feel faint and she knew she needed help. Stumbling over to her bed, she managed to reached for her phone and clumsily dial Carolyn's number.

"Mom pick up, please pick up." She cried as she tried her best to keep herself from falling unconscious but it was getting harder and harder as time ticked up.

"Hello dear, I'm just on my way home. Is everything alright?" Carolyn asked softly down the phone.

"Mom..." she gasped out and something in her voice immediately made Carolyn panic. "There's...I'm in...there's blood..." she attempted to say as her eyes began to drift shut.

"Meredith what do you mean there's blood?" Carolyn said calmly even though everything inside of her was telling her to panic. "Mark is phoning an ambulance, I just need you to stay awake and talk to me, just stay awake ok."

"So tired." Meredith mumbled out as her arm was starting to feel to weak to hold the phone up to her ear. "The baby...save my baby..."

With that Meredith's arm dropped down on the bed, the phone falling out of her hand. She could hear Carolyn begging for her to stay awake but she just couldn't, all she could see was his face.

Derek's smile.

It consumed her thoughts as her body relaxed and Derek's face became clearer and clearer. She was so close to him and she was sure if she reached up she would be able to touch him but every time she got close enough, he moved further away.

It was like he was giving her a message. To stay. She had to stay. Their boy needed them. But she wasn't sure if anyone would make to her in time.

One lone tear rolled down her cheek, staining her cheek before dropping down onto the bed. She wanted to live, she wanted to have a life with her son but she didn't know if she was strong enough to hold on.

All she could do was hope and pray that someone would make it to them on time.