Revenge {S.R. x Reader 18+}

Rarefied

Content Warnings: manipulation, being scared of your significant other, talks of harming others, talks of murder, planning

Word count: 640 (little intermission chapter)

A/n: I am back!!! I appreciate everyone who has been patiently waiting my return. I've been having a rough time mentally and medically but we are getting there. Your patience and kind words mean more than you'll ever know. I appreciate and love all of you so much.
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I knew he didn't sleep. I knew his brain just wouldn't shut the fuck up. Sometimes I wished I could read minds. That I could dig inside his head and know exactly what's happening. Spencers big on shoving down his feelings. He likes to pretend they aren't there. Pretend to the world, and himself, that his feelings are not real. That they do not matter.

But they did matter. To me they mattered, he mattered.

"Who are we going after today?" I asked as we got dressed for the day. Something overly domestic that made my heart ache just a little.

He shrugs, spitting his toothpaste in the sink and rinsing his mouth, "I don't know. I would like to go after my team."

His team. Former team is more like it. The 'friends' who let him suffer. The ones who knew he was not okay, but didn't give enough fucks about him to do something, or get him help. I'd like to go after them too. Every single one of them. They needed to hurt like he did. Killing their spouses would do that. Children were off limits, rightfully so.

"How do we do that? I feel like out of everyone, that would get us caught," I said. I knew I was stating the obvious, but it needed to be said. Spencer and I had a bad habit of acting without thinking things through. It was something that would be our downfall. I had set a mental reminder to start thinking a little more.

"It might take some planning. I know there are a few previous team members I could go after. It'd hit the current ones just as hard, if not harder." He pulled on some clothes as they spoke, exhaustion weighing on his body.

I couldn't help but wonder when enough would be enough? When would he hang it up? Would he ever hang it up? I feared for the day he did. I wondered if he'd turn me in too. I knew what would happen then: I'd be put in jail for the rest of life — or killed via the death penalty — and Spencer would maybe spend a year in prison. Maybe less. Maybe none at all. The thought made me angry. I didn't want to be blamed for something he dragged me into.

"What if we started small. Say, a break in. We leave no tracks and just send a message?"

He pauses and turns toward me, my stomach twisting with nerves. Typically, he was the one who made the plans. He was the one who told me what to do and where to go. And, frankly, after last night, I should just be keeping my mouth shut. He didn't need to be pissed off. Honestly, I should just be keeping quiet anyway.

But a grin spreads across his face, and my nerves cease slightly, "have I ever told you that you're so smart?"

He has, but I'm unsure if he wants to hear me say that. So, I just keep silent. He pulls his shirt over his head and steps closer to me. His hands move toward my face, making me flinch. That only seems to make his smile grow.

"Aw... are you afraid of me, pet?" His hands cup my face, thumbs caressing over my cheeks.

I shake my head as best I can, "no," my voice sounds scratchy as I say it, "just got nervous is all. Sorry."

He kisses me softly, "you're a shit liar my pet," he murmurs and I audibly swallow. His hands drop from my face and I relax just a little, "but I do like your idea. We need to make sure we leave nothing behind but the 'message', whatever that will be. Got it?"

I nod slowly, voice soft as I mutter, "yes, daddy. I got it."