All the seconds

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Taeyong rests his head against the wall. The famous Inkigayo steps are right next to him, but unlike most of the time, it's completely empty. The hallway is dark, and for a moment, everything is silent.

He takes a deep breath.

Thinks about his twenty two members currently inside one of the changing rooms, far away down the hall. He thinks about his career, his rapping. But most of all, he thinks about how he wishes his mind could stay still. Even if it was just for a second. Because right now, it's rushing with negative thoughts.

Honestly he never expected this to happen. It was supposed to be a good day, and it started out well. He always has everything under control, he is always perfect and ready to take on any challenge. He can handle being in serval groups at once, super m, nct 127, nct u and while doing that he can easily handle being the leader of twenty two. That's why he was chosen as the leader. Both because he knew he could handle it, and because the fans wanted it. Taeyong is honored, honestly, that the fans wanted him to be the leader, and that the members respect him enough as a leader. This far its been going great.

And then, on this perfect day, everything has to come falling down. He has dance practice tomorrow, and some photo shoots and two interviews. And yet, on this simple Inkigayo stage, he twists his leg? It's thumping, it hurts so bad. At this point, Taeyong doesn't dare to move it. He doesn't want to look at it. One moment he was dancing as perfectly as always, and the next he bent his leg at the most awkward angle possible. Sure, he is inhumanly flexible because of his loose joints, but even he knew that the awkward angle his leg bent to was not good.

And it wasn't, but he didn't loose face. Not even for a second did he show any indication of pain. Nobody can know. The other members can get injured and sick, there are twenty three of them after all. But he can't, he's the leader. Injuries have happened to him before, but not at such an important time as this. All of NCT have finally come together for a comeback and he decides to ruin it? Their leader can not be injured, not when they need him. So he held a happy smile, saying that he had to go to the bathroom, and headed down the hall while smiling and bowing to whoever walked past him. It's first now, fifteen minutes later, that he sits against the wall with a pained face. It's first now that he allows himself to be somewhat weak.

What did he do to deserve this?

Taeyong sighs again, this time hoping that his sigh could miraculously heal his leg. What is he going to do? If he tells someone about his injury he's going to have to face all the things that come with it, the disappointment, the work, the different complications. But if he doesn't tell anyone, he will face angry doctors and angry managers and angry members. It's a loose loose situation. If only he had Winwin instead.

Maybe it's karma for that feud they started with seventeen. Taeyong doesn't know why that exact thought comes to mind. He thinks about scoups. That man was a leader of twelve while he was still a leader of ten. Now scoups has the same twelve members while he has twenty two. He used to admire him, and secretly he still does. But things are complicated between the two groups. Ever since Jaehyun started arguing with the other 97 liners, the Chinese members of both groups started growing tense relations and slowly it spread to the whole group. Now they've been on bad terms for two straight years and Taeyong doesn't think most of them remember why.

It's ridiculous honestly. They glare at each other in the halls, they don't listen to each other's music on purpose and Jaehyun always talks about the fights he has with the 97 liners in the 97 group chat. It came to the point where Jaehyun stopped hanging out with his 97 liner friends, and to this day Taeyong isn't exactly sure what the first argument was about. But he shamefully has to admit that he too dislikes the seventeen members, after who years of the two groups feuding. He has a soft spot for Jaehyun after all, their first ever maknae, and he can't help disliking those that Jaehyun dislikes.

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