TW: SUICIDE don't read if suicide triggers you...
A few months pass with their secret relationship...
Ciel's Point of View:
I'm signing papers at my desk and I begin to get suicidal. No matter how hard I try I can't push these thoughts from my head.
I quietly mumble to myself,
" I don't want to be in this world anymore... "
Sebastian is probably chiding the servants and fixing their mistakes. He's always doing that.
I can't stop thinking it. I may actually try. I mean what's the point of going on anymore? I'm just a dog for the queen, people always try to cheat me out of my money.
My parents are dead....
I stand up and go to look out the window.
No one is around to see me. Let's just get it over with...
I pick up a gun from the side table and turn it over in my hand. By now Sebastian would've gotten that feeling he gets whenever I'm in trouble.
So we need to hurry. Tears silently stream down my cheeks. " Goodbye, world. " I put it to my chest and put my finger on the trigger.
Sebastian enters from the window, and before I pull the trigger he knocks the gun from my hand to go aside causing us to land on the floor.
His eyes wide with shock, " Ciel... " I gave him permission to use my name when nobody is around.
Tears begin to pour from my eyes. " I hate living, all I feel is constant guilt. I don't want to be here anymore! "
I try to reach for the gun but I'm being pinned under him. " Stop this! You must live! Your parents didn't die so you could cease to exist! " He exclaims.
At this point I'm sobbing, " What's the point going on anymore?! " I reach for the gun, but once again I can't reach it. I try to wriggle myself free.
" Please, Ciel. You can protect others and exact revenge! You can enjoy yourself! "
" I-I can't anymore. I just want to die! " Tears still streaming from my eyes, I try to push him off me.
" Just get off me. My parents are dead. I was tortured. I'm a damn dog for the queen. I don't want to live with it anymore. " I say.
Sebastian is almost crying and I pause. " You are the only being I've ever loved. Don't leave me alone. " He says. " S-Sebastian... "
A single tear falls from his eye onto my face. I wrap my arms around his neck. " I-I'm s-sorry Sebastian. I won't leave you. " I cry into him.
He sits up with me and removes my eye patch. I cry into his chest. " I will never leave you. P-Please forgive me. "
He nods whispering, " You are mine, and I am yours. I will always protect you. "
I hold onto him tighter. " I love you, and there is nothing to forgive. I will help you. I slowly nod and sniffle and try to regain composure.
He puts his coat on me like a blanket and holds me, comforting me. I pull away for a moment and say, " I love you... "
He kisses me softly. I lean into the kiss and close my eyes. He cups my face in his hands. We pull away and look at each other. We stayed there for a while comforting each other.
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That was interesting... 👁️👄👁️
